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michelle-is-writing · 2 years ago

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Unexpected ch.1, Spencer Reid

Word count: 2k~

Warning: angst - and a lot of it!

To most people, their childhoods are left behind in the past with very few memories recoverable. However, for me, my childhood memories stuck with me throughout all of my years of growing older. There were a few memories of playing outside and meeting new friends, but the abundant ones revolved around me spending time with a brunet boy hidden behind tortoiseshell glasses whom I adored, and at times, I'd like to think he adored me as well.

The reason why so many of my memories were filled with images of Spencer was because we were an inseparable pair as young kids. Despite him not going to the same school as me (since he was constantly moving to higher grades), we were still close thanks to us being neighbors. Both Spencer and I were only six, and we were playing chess on a regular basis instead of toy cars or dolls. Even so, the toy cars that Spencer's dad did buy him were never put to their intended use, and instead, examples for work problems with acceleration in advanced physics.

When the time came that Spencer turned eighteen, everything turned around. At the time, I discovered I was in love with him. I had grown to admire everything he did for not only himself, but his mom as well. He was putting himself through college with a lot of hard work behind him, while at the same time, caring for his schizophrenic mother who was inconsolable at times. To help out, I would watch her during the days and work on my school work at the same time. The conversations between Diana and I were always sweet with her telling me that she enjoyed the thought of Spencer and me getting together one day, but her words only made the oncoming heartbreak harsher.

One day, I was smiling with Spencer as he explained to me the laws he had learned in Chemistry, and on the next day, I was opening the door to a previously occupied apartment with nothing in sight. The furniture was gone along with everything on the walls. Diana was no longer at her bed either, and all that was left was dust bunnies in the corner. It appeared as if Spencer and Diana had left without saying goodbye, when in reality, that's what I was coming over there to tell them.

After months and months of hard work, my essays and letters got me into a college three states away that specialized with criminal justice and the many branches involved in it. For six straight years, I studied long and hard and managed to pull off a bachelor's in criminal justice and a bachelor's in psychology and sociology. My hard work paid off for once, and despite doing it with friends and family there to support me, I still thought about the missing person in my life. After a while, what hurt most was the realization that the boy whom I had grown up with for nearly the entire duration of my life was now a man who wouldn't be there for the rest of it.

With my specialties in profiling, I applied to the United States Department of Justice in an attempt to earn a position in helping solve missing cases with adolescents. However, our wishes aren't always delivered to us as I was instead given a place in the Behavioral Analysis Unit. I was happy and excited to receive this job, but when I entered the large and heavily secured building, I felt the air in my lungs escape me. Not because of pure exhilaration, but because of true and utter shock.

I had already met with the leader of the team I would be joining and got along with him well. Even over the phone, Hotch was a nice man, and I could tell he prioritized his team. Because of that, I felt confident that maybe I was in a place I belonged in for once. Although, my thoughts weren't all the same once my eyes landed on those of the man who I hadn't gotten to see grow older like me.

His face had smoothed out as well as his long hair turning wavy. His stature was now quite a bit taller, but he was still skinny like he was when he was younger. Plus, his fashion had changed just a little with the new addition of a dark blue tie and his brown eyes no longer windowed behind his glasses. Yet, at the same time, those brown eyes were the only things to not have changed through the years - they were still the brown eyes of the young man I loved years ago, and once my gaze caught his shocked one, I felt my heart plummet back into the love spell it was webbed in before.

As Hotch introduced me to the team, Spencer didn't say anything until everyone else had gotten a turn before hugging me to him, making my chest sting as I hugged him back. This was the person I once loved that left me in the dust during a time I needed him desperately, and now, he was the person I felt myself falling in love with once more with a certain pang following each beat of my heart. Although this pang was caused by the love I had for him, it was a painful pang that felt as if every breath I took would break a rib at any moment.

Weeks went by and I learned so much about Spencer. He had gotten even more degrees under his belt during the time we were apart, and he got to do so many odd things in his time at the BAU. He got to make-out with a celebrity in her pool; he contracted anthrax poisoning on a case; but most of all, he met and fell in love with a doctor by the name of Maeve Donovan.

The way he described her showed that he loved her like no other. He talked about how beautiful and intelligent she was while mentioning how he wished he could've known her longer. It was obvious that when she died, a part of him did too, and unfortunately, Spencer held no hesitation in telling me what that specific part was.

"I don't think there's anyone in the world that could compare to Maeve," He told me, staring out the jet window while I listened on, pretending that his swears of only loving like that once in his lifetime didn't stab me like a knife. "No one could ever be like her."

Barely a few weeks passed after that conversation that Spencer and I were acting as if we had never separated in our friendship. The only difference was the fact that it seemed like Spencer was holding himself back. He had no hesitation in telling me the things he said about Maeve, but anything that had to do with his feelings about himself was seemingly off-limits. Garcia even told me that I was the only person Spencer had opened up to about Maeve. He didn't feel comfortable saying anything else any other time.

There was even a time where Spencer and I had started a game of chess on our way back from a case. Both of us sitting at the mini table, we both exchanged moves back and forth while competitive smiles rested on our faces. "Do you remember doing this when we were younger?" I asked him, moving a knight to a different position.

"Of course," Spencer responded, countering my move with a knight of his own. "How could I ever forget?"

"You have an eidetic memory, that's right," I pointed out, giving a little chuckle afterward.

Meanwhile, Spencer happily shook his head. "No, it-it's not just that," He stuttered out, causing me to turn an eyebrow at him.

"Then what is it?" I questioned him, confused by his sudden nervousness.

However, what confused me even more was the drop of his smile that followed directly afterward. "...I don't know."

Despite all of this, we were still close to each other - just with a few missing aspects here and there in our friendship. Although this was the case, I still felt my overall attraction to Spencer remain the same. In spite of knowing that he would probably never love me back, I still swooned when he was near me, or when he would simply smile.

Then, it all came to a turning point one night.

We were lounging around his apartment after a late case before ultimately ending up in his bed, our clothes strewn across the room while our hands roamed each other's bodies like maps. Words were muttered and moaned through our lips with each moment of passion passing, and through it all, there was still a lack of depth that showed Spencer and his true self.

Out of breath, we both lie on the bed together with our chests heaving up and down. Spencer rests his arm lazily across my waist while my back presses up against his chest. Thinking about everything, my brain reminds me this isn't right - this is only going to make my feelings for Spencer grow. After this, I'm going to want more, and with the implication that Spencer might feel something for me after all, I know I'm going to need more.

"I miss Maeve sometimes," Spencer speaks up, causing my eyes to widen. "Really, I miss her all the time," He adds, my chest stopping in its motions as I wait for the next damning words to fall from his lips. "I don't know... how I get through without someone like her confuses me sometimes."

Hearing Spencer say these things causes my stomach to churn. We just finished doing something so intimate that only two close people do when they love each other, but I don't think Spencer feels that way. I guess I wrongly assumed Spencer's feelings for me, and I guess... I'm still not enough.

"I'll be right back," I murmur, not letting Spencer continue on his evening confessions. Leaving Spencer's hold, I stand from the bed and head into the bathroom where I quietly shut the door behind me and slide down against it. Pulling my knees to me as close as I can, I hang my head in a mix of shame and sadness. What have I done wrong in trying to let Spencer know I love him? What have I done so incorrectly that it's brought me to the point where I'm silently sobbing on his bathroom floor with so many horrible emotions flowing through me?

Although, did Spencer really want to do this because he has feelings for me? Or is he still so stuck on Maeve nearly half a decade later that he feels as if he's still with her and this means nothing? How could I ever be comfortable being in a relationship with him when it feels like he's forcing himself to be comfortable with me? I can't do that to him.

After a few more minutes of my sobbing, I wipe away my tears and stand from the cold tile floor before heading back into Spencer's bedroom. Seeing him now asleep on his bed with his arms held out waiting for me, I close my eyes before turning away. I know that no matter how hard I try, he won't view me as his girlfriend or partner. He'll see me as a replacement for Maeve.

"I'm sorry," I whisper, throwing my hands to my mouth to cover my sob. Thankfully, Spencer doesn't wake up as I'm putting my clothes on, and by the time I'm done gathering my things, he's lying on his stomach with his head pushed into his pillow. Walking toward the man I've loved all of my life, I feel my heart slowly break with each step I take, and by the time I reach his side, I feel torn as I whisper my last words to him. "I'm sorry I'll never be Maeve..."

Read the the second part here!

#spencer reid #spencer reid imagines #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x reader #Matthew Gray Gubler #matthew gray gubler imagine #matthew gray gubler imagines #matthew gray gubler x reader #Criminal Minds #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds imagines #criminal minds x reader

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kryptonitejelly · 3 years ago

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“Agent” | Aaron Hotchner x You

“Agent”

Criminal Minds - Aaron Hotchner x You Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x You Genre: Slightly suggestive, fluff Warnings: Slightly suggestive content; minors DNI Length: Drabble Where you work at the DOJ, and you finally get a chance to consult on one of your husband’s cases.

A/N: Imagine you are 38, and Hotch is 45.

***

“(Y/L/N)” you hit the speaker button of the ringing phone on your desk, before dropping your pen onto the open folder in front of you.

“Need you on a consult” the familiar voice of Richard “Bob” Andrews, your boss at the DOJ crackles over the line.

“Can I say no?” you pull a face as you proffer the question, which you already know the answer to, while stretching your feet out under your desk. It wasn’t that you weren’t willing to help out, but it had been an insanely busy few months, and you were feeling it. Life at the DOJ was, on a normal basis, generally better than it had been in the past few months. It was usually (much) better in terms of hours, but recently, there had been an influx of cases, all of which you were taking lead on, that were moving simultaneously at full speed ahead.

“No” Andrews chuckles at your question, you had been working for the man for slightly over 10 years now, fresh out of law school, and he had long gotten used to you. “The brief and files been sent, check your email. I have a feeling you might change your mind once you get a look at it.”

“Doubt it” you grumble as you turn your chair, sliding it forward towards the computer positioned on the right side of your desk.

“They are expecting you there today” Andrews voice crackles over the line in parting and he hangs up. You sigh, in obvious annoyance as you press the end call button on your desk phone to silence it before moving to open the email that had just hit your already overflowing inbox.

From: Andrews, Richard To: (Y/L/N), (Y/N) Title: CLASSIFIED - REQUEST FOR CONSULT (FBI - BAU)

Your eyes widened as your gaze skimmed the title of the email, comprehension regarding Andrew’s penultimate sentence to your conversation dawning over your face.

***

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N), DOJ - here for a consult with the BAU” you slide your DOJ issued tag across the counter for it to be scanned, before it is slid back to you by the receptionist, along with a short term visitors tag.

“Lifts to your right.”

“Thanks” you flash a smile at the receptionist while pinning both tags onto the band of your skirt before heading for the lifts. Stepping into an open lift, you press the floor button for the BAU, a small smirk playing on your face. The lift ride is short and the doors spring open to a blonde in a heap of colour.

“(Y/N)” the squeal hits you before blonde does, engulfing you in the biggest bear hug of all times.

“Its good to see you too Pen” you laugh as your arms encircle Penelope Garcia in a hug. “Although I did just see you last week at Rossi’s dinner”, you chuckle as the technical analyst responds with an even tighter squeeze.

“Yes, but that was then. This is now. This is different, you are going to be working with us” Garcia’s voice increase in both volume and excitement as she releases you from her embrace, and drags you through the glass doors of the BAU.

“(Y/N)!” Multiple voices greet you in excitement as you are dragged into the bullpen by Garcia.

“Hey guys” you smile, your eyes twinkling as you look over the faces of Morgan, JJ, Emily, and Reid.

“We hardly ever get to work together” Emily squeals as she grabs you into an embrace. It was true, you hardly ever got to consult with them. More often than not, what the BAU needed was not something a prosecutor from the DOJ, with an expertise in financial crimes, could provide. It was usually an expert in blood splatter, someone with certain a certain medical, or scientific skill sets, or a linguist with a knowledge of all the different languages of the world, which the BAU needed (or possibly, just one Dr Spencer Reid). It was just your luck that the Unsub in this case had his victims intertwined with an interconnected myriad of very illegal financial transactions.

“Hardly” you nodded in agreement as you squeezed Emily back, before making your rounds around the team, turning to embrace Derek, JJ, and finally the resident germaphobe, Reid, who despite numerous protests within the first few months of meeting you, had come to grudgingly accept that much like the women of his team, you too were a hugger.

“Where are Mom and Dad?” You question and Morgan cocks his head towards the shuttered room perched on the landing overlooking the bullpen.

“In Hotch’s room.”

“Got it, I’ll say hi.” Your words are met with a grin from Garcia, a wink from Morgan, and smiles from Emily, JJ and Reid, as you flip on your heels to ascend the stairs.

***

“Come in” the familiar deep voice, commanding and calm greets you rap your knuckles against the door.

You enter, cracking open the door, and sticking your head in first. The rest of your body follows as you hear Rossi’s excited greeting of “Bellissima, you’re here!”

You embrace him, in the way you would a father figure and he plants his trade mark Italian kisses on both cheeks.

“It is so rarely I see you in full battle gear”, he chuckles as he spins you in a small circle as a proud father would, to which you obliged, doing a spin in your battle attire (no kevlar vests here) black heels, pencil skirt, white blouse, jacket and matching pearl necklace.

“Do I look older today” you tease, the running joke among the team being that you and Reid looked younger than you actually were, something you credited to genes, and the gruelling runs and workouts which your husband put you through - better than any anti-aging creams on the market.

“Just slightly bella.” Rossi grins as he strides towards the door. “I’ll let Aaron catch you up.” He winks, and exits, shutting the door with a click behind him.

***

A moment after the door closes you feel it, a hand pulling you close to where he sits leaning against the front of his desk, and immediately after a pair of hands winding themselves around your waist. You shimmy closer to him from your position, standing between his legs, and he pulls you closer towards him, as you snake your hands around his neck loosely for balance.

“Hey” your husband breathes as his gaze meets yours, the twinkle in his eyes evident, despite last seeing you just earlier this morning.

“Hey yourself Agent Hotchner” you breathe back as you observe the boyish smile on his face creep up, as his work facade (as you like to call it) slips away. You run your fingers up and down the nape of his neck, and you watch as you exhales into your touch.

“I thought Agent was reserved for the bedroom” he chuckles. There is an unmistakable brief flash of lust in his eyes, as you feel his hands slip down towards your ass, cupping each cheek in hand.

“Hmm” you hum, as you press yourself into his front, your fingers continuing to stroke the back of his neck. You can feel his body, muscles straining against his white shirt, hard against yours. Your facial expression maintains its innocence, but you push your hips into his. You see him exhale, as he fights a groan.

“Its only right I call you Agent - isn’t it?” You wonder out loud, schooling your features into a wondering expression. “After all, we are in the BAU, which is your place of work, is it not… Agent?”

You lean forward, your hips maintaining their firm press into his as you plant a kiss below his ear, and on his neck before pulling away.

“Babe…” he most definitely groans this time, and you can’t help but giggle, because you know you got him. Babe is for moments like this, private moments only both of you see. Honey is reserved for more tame moments, more public moments.

“Yes Agent” your hands move down his chest, abs, before coming to rest on the waistband of his slacks, tracing a line along the top of his belt.

He closes his eyes as his head drops an inch backwards, as he allows his self control to fight with instinct. Your hands drop, fingers tracing the most certainly hardening bulge in his pants. His eyes snap open in response and he grips your ass cheeks, pulling your closer before his lips claim yours.

“You are maddening” he mumbles as his lips slide over yours. You slip your hands around his middle, in the space between his shirt and suit jacket, while nipping down on his bottom lip before pulling away.

“I believe we have a case, Agent” Forehead resting against his, you are the first to open your eyes. His expression, eyes closed, is calm, but the ragged edge of his breathing gives him away. The fight against propriety, a full office of agents just beyond the door, and the urge to bend you across his table is a struggle.

“I guess we do.” He sighs loudly in response as his eyes flicker open, dark brown pools meeting yours, propriety winning the battle.

“Come on” you laugh in response, planting a much more chaste kiss on his lips before pulling away, reluctantly from the warmth of his arms.

“We’ll pick up from where we left off tonight”, a statement, not a question, as he stands, adjusting his tie with a hand, before striding to pull open the door, holding it open for you.

“Yes, Sir.” You purr, as you brush your hand against his midsection before walking out the door.

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radiant-reid · 3 years ago

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Love/Hate Island

Chapter 1

Series Masterlist

Spencer Reid's decision to conceal the breakup with his girlfriend of two years becomes a problem when Rossi orders him to bring her to his new Long Island mansion on a week-long vacation with the team. Can their relationship be fixed? Do they want it to be?

Summary: Spencer's lies, both by omission and outright, become an immediate issue. A call to his ex-girlfriend, asking for a favor, plays out better than he expected

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Content Warning: swearing | tiny sexual allusion

Word Count: 2.6k

A/n: I have no impulse control posting this... I’m just too excited

Spencer decided after 1 week that he was over it. He read studies, like usual, they suggested it took anywhere from 21 days to 11 weeks to 3 and a half months, to half the time you were with that person- in Spencer's case, 1 year- but Spencer was never average.

It took the average student 8.2 years to complete a doctorate degree, with a bachelor's degree in the same subject. Spencer had gotten two in 4 years while also getting two additional BAs (4 years, on average, of study each)

So he didn't think it odd that he was able to cram his grieving into 7 days. It was useful. It meant he could properly focus on the case that the BAU had 5 days after the breakup.

No one noticed- a fact he was grateful for after he tried to make it inconspicuous. That did mean not telling the team about it. Not Derek, or JJ, or Emily, or Penelope. Not a single one of them knew. He went on like normal, possibly- although he'd never admit it- compartmentalizing the unbearably upsetting event.

So yeah, he was over it. He barely thought about it. Those two years were pushed out of his brain.

It wasn't even on his mind that Wednesday afternoon, 6 weeks after the breakup.

"Everybody, I've got an announcement." Rossi dramatically spoke once the team had hauled themselves into the round table room. Hotch was absent, but it wasn't close to his birthday, so it couldn't be about a surprise party. Garcia, practically jumping up and down next to him, obviously already knew. She always knew everything, apart from Spencer's breakup. A fact he was inwardly smug about.

Spencer wasn't sure where it was going, but he felt slightly uneasy about the whole thing.

"I've brought a new mansion in Long Island, and I'm throwing a little house warming party," Rossi revealed, looking around the table to catch their reactions. It didn't sound too bad to Spencer, spending a weekend at Rossi's. He loved the team, and they were always good fun. "Hotch has already approved for us to all have a week off, so no excuses." He continued.

Spencer's enthusiasm was dwindling as he thought of his ex-girlfriend. Intelligently, and because he knew it was a complete lie, when Y/n's name first came up after the breakup, he told them she was in New York.

She was in New York for work, he wasn't sure how long she spent there, but he knew she went there after the breakup for a criminal trial.

Spencer watched as JJ and Emily hugged Rossi, congratulating and thanking him.

"Will and Henry are invited, too," Rossi told JJ. That did make Spencer more excited. "Hotch is bringing Jack. You can all bring someone." He announced to the group.

Spencer gulped, preparing to lie and say Y/n was visiting family. Honestly, he had no idea where she'd been for the last 4 weeks.

"Reid, you've got to bring Y/n. We haven't seen her in weeks." Rossi's eyes flicked to the youngest person in the room.

Shit, now he was in trouble. "Oh, um, Y/n might have a heavy caseload," Spencer spoke as he tried to keep his tone even. He figured they would understand, often missing things due to their jobs.

While the BAU caught the criminals, Y/n prosecuted or defended them. It was how they came to know each other. Hotch, when he was an attorney, was her mentor while she was still in law school. Once she finished and was living in DC, they kept in touch, and she met Spencer. They didn't start dating until after Haley died, odd how death brought people together. Y/n was spending more time with Jack which led to her in the office a few times while Spencer was there.

"We haven't seen her in, what, a month?" Emily asked, tipping her head to the side like she was suggesting something else was going on.

Her guess was two weeks out from the truth, but Spencer wasn't about to correct her.

"Where are you keeping her, Spence?" JJ asked, joining in on the interrogation.

Morgan just chuckled as he looked at Spencer's blushing cheeks.

Feeling like he was under the spotlight, Spencer snapped. "Fine, she'll come." He said it without thinking. Only after realizing he was going to have to backtrack somehow.

"Perfect." Rossi hummed, a smile on his lips. It annoyed Spencer how much the team liked Y/n. That was another reason he didn't tell them he thought they'd take his side. "We're taking the jet in a week" Rossi held up one finger to punctuate his point.

Spencer tried to push it out of his mind for the rest of the day, determined to finish his paperwork so he could go home early.

It was just before 5 when he took a few files to Hotch's office.

"Hotch, these are from the South Carolina case," Spencer announced after knocking on the door.

Hotch looked up from his desk, pen still in hand, meeting Spencer's eyes. The intense stare made him gulp, worried Hotch knew something. Knew about his little secret.

"Here's fine, Reid," Hotch said, tapping a pile on the cluttered but organized desk. Spencer nodded, placing the files down and ready to scurry out of the room. "I was talking to Y/n earlier." He mentioned, voice even-toned. Spencer froze where he was standing, palms starting to sweat. He tried to regulate his breathing, but it wasn't working.

Hotch was such a good profiler he was able to remain completely neutral. It meant Spencer couldn't determine whether or not he knew.

Spencer attempted to do the same thing, but it didn't work. "Oh?" In his own tone, he could hear the nervousness.

"She said you hadn't told her about Rossi's yet," Hotch explained, face still stoic.

Spencer wasn't sure whether to lie and potentially get caught out or not. "Oh, my phone's dead." That wasn't a lie. To accentuate his point, he held up the flat phone.

As he stood under Hotch's stare, he felt incredibly sorry for Jack. That kid would never be able to sneak out of the house. And if he did, he'd crack the next day when Hotch asked how he'd slept.

Hotch nodded sharply. "Oh." He said, still Spencer couldn't work out if he knew. "I'm sure she'll be able to come now that she's finishing up in Pittsburg tomorrow." So that's where she was.

Spencer realized that must have meant Y/n hadn't told Hotch they'd broken up, despite how close she was to his Unit Cheif.

"I bet you missed her," Hotch commented, ripping Spencer out of his overthinking.

Spencer forced himself to nod, plastering a smile on his face. "Yeah, but it's similar to being apart when I'm on cases." He lied, hoping Hotch wouldn't notice.

"Still, you should go home and call her," Hotch said sympathetically. Spencer always felt nervous around Hotch, like the cliche of how he was supposed to react around Y/n's father. Hotch, he knew, was much scarier.

Spencer nodded again, smiling more happily. "Yeah, I will." Lie.

"Good." Hotch didn't notice. Maybe he was blinded by his father-like affection for Y/n. "I'm really proud of her." He commented absentmindedly.

Spencer replied without missing a beat. "Me too." He didn't have to lie that time.

"Goodnight, Spencer." Hotch farewelled him.

"Goodnight, sir," Spencer replied before leaving the room. Once he was outside, he took a deep breath, immediately relaxing. He touched a hand to his cheek, hoping it wasn't too hot. It was. He just hoped Hotch figured it was in adoration of his ex-girlfriend.

Spencer raced to grab his messenger bag, walking out of the building as quickly as he could. He thought the entire way to the metro. Even the whole train ride where he usually read, subsequently receiving odd looks from strangers, who assumed he was skipping books around Quantum mechanics.

Finally, once he was back in his new apartment, he felt like he could breathe again.

Getting around the address line on his personal information form was something he figured would be challenging. It wasn't. He simply brought Garcia a new mug. Telling her it was waiting in the kitchen, with her favorite tea in it, was enough of a distraction for him to change the detail.

Unsure of why he was doing it, Spencer plugged in his phone to charge. It wasn't exactly like he wanted to call Y/n. But he was now in a complicated position. Y/n knew. Spencer now knew she knew. Spencer didn't know if Y/n knew that he knew. His head was a mess.

He didn't have the chance to decide if he was going to call when his phone rang. Y/n's ringtone. The ringtone she set the first night they slept together, insisting he needed to know when it was her calling. Spencer hadn't forgotten about it, but he didn't know how to change it, and he couldn't exactly ask Garcia.

After sucking in a sharp breath, reassuring himself he was completely over her, he answered the call.

"Y/n." Without seeing her, it was a lot easier to maintain a Hotch-like tone.

"Spencer fucking Reid." She answered, tone dripping with disdain. Disdain for him. "Why did I get a call from my favorite member of the BAU, that would be Aaron, that I'm invited to Rossi's new mansion with you?" She asked, clearly mad at him.

Spencer smirked smugly. "Oh, well, that would be because you are." He sarcastically answered, determined to piss her off as much as he could. In hindsight, it wasn't a good idea. After all, he needed a favor from her and a pretty big one at that.

"Great, thank you so much, Genius." She replied just as sarcastically before her voice changed back to angry. "Why does he think we're still in a relationship?"

"Oh, right." Spencer played it dumb. "That would be because I didn't tell anyone we broke up." He replied, trying to sound confident.

He could imagine Y/n throwing her arms up in the air, feeling like she was fighting a losing battle with him. "Could you maybe explain why that was? Because the last time we talked about our relationship, we both agreed it was over." She kept her tone just as hateful, but she wasn't yelling.

Spencer wasn't exactly sure how to explain it. He definitely wasn't about to tell her the truth. He was about to say it never came up, but he respected her more than that. "I know it's over. I just didn't want to tell them?" He said like it was a question, voice jumping up an octave.

"Well, that's really unhelpful because now Aaron thinks we're still together," Y/n replied quickly, determined not to let him beat her.

"Okay, so, why didn't you tell Hotch we weren't dating?" Spencer quipped cleverly.

The silence was enough to tell him she didn't have a good enough answer. Still, she spat one out. "That was your responsibility. You work with him."

"You've known him longer," Spencer argued. Despite the fact he needed a favor, something about her infuriated him.

"Seriously, Spencer, this is so stupid. Just, please, let me get on with my life." She begged. Spencer could tell there was something sad in her tone.

He didn't press her on it, not wanting to give her the illusion he cared and not willing to stoop as low as to tease her. He did, however, beg. "Come with me, please."

Y/n huffed into the phone, verbally expressing her contempt. "Why? Why can't you just tell them we broke up?"

Spencer was smart enough to dodge the question. "Jack's coming." He attempted to persuade her. "I'm sure you've not seen him or Hotch since you've been in Pittsburg." He continued smugly. While he knew it was morally wrong to guilt-trip her, he did so anyway, absolutely trying to avoid telling the team of their split.

Before he could keep going, Y/n cut him off. "How do you know about Pittsburg?" She demanded. Before he could reply, she figured it out, still as sharp as ever. "Aaron."

"Mmhm. So, a week in David Rossi's new mansion?" Spencer offered like she was actually his girlfriend. "You don't even have to speak to me." He tried, still not receiving an answer.

Y/n groaned, knowing what her answer was going to be. She hated herself for it. "Fine." She agreed with as neutral a word as she could think of. "But we are not getting back together, nor are we together." She stated firmly. She was willing to lie to them for a week so, she got to leave them properly. Plus, Rossi's new house was bound to be exquisite.

"Always a stickler for the rules," Spencer commented under his breath but loud enough for her to hear. He knew remarks like that would irritate her, they always used to.

He could almost imagine her eye roll and the way she'd bite her lip to suppress an outburst. "You piss me off. I hope you know that." She simply stated, but he already knew that.

Spencer ignored the comment, also something that would annoy her. "Do you want to come over?" He asked smugly.

"Absolutely not. We're not getting back together, so I'm not coming to your apartment." Y/n spat back almost instantly.

Spencer knew what his words were insinuating. He'd said the identical words multiple times before they lived together. Either for some mind-blowing sex or just a deep late-night conversation.

"Didn't mean it like that, princess." He teased, unable to continue before she cut him off.

"Do not call me that, Reid." She insisted. Surprisingly, it was a pet name he'd never used before. If he had, while they were dating, she would have thought it was sweet, but she couldn't hear anything in his voice other than taunting.

"Alright, alright, calm down." Spencer was absolutely never that condescending. Then again, he'd never had an ex-girlfriend with two years of relationship history. "All I'm saying is I've clearly missed a lot. That's going to be apparent if we turn up to Rossi's, and I don't know where you've been for the last 6 weeks." He explained.

As much as Y/n was loathed to admit it, he was right. At least she wasn't able to kid herself into thinking he actually cared. "Agreed, but, firstly, if we weren't in this situation, which is your fault, my whereabouts would be absolutely none of your business." She firmly stated, pushing back where ever possible. "Secondly, I'm not coming to your apartment. We can meet somewhere neutral." She decided.

Spending extra time with Spencer wasn't something she wanted to do. However, she realized, it would be very apparent if she hopped on the jet, and it was the first time she'd seen him in a month and a half.

"Perfect," Spencer replied, trying to sound as joyful as possible. "Breakfast tomorrow, anywhere you want."

Y/n thought about it for a second. Clearly, she knew she was going to have to see him. She just didn't expect it was going to be so soon. "There's a great place by my apartment. I'll text you to address." She almost said it like she said in the early stages of their relationship. A fact that nauseated her.

"See you there at 8, princess." Spencer farewelled, quickly hanging up with a chuckle, feeling like he'd won.

Next chapter

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spencer-reids-adventures · 3 years ago

Note

hi! i love your fics and if possible, i would love a CM fic about s3e16 elephant’s memory with hotch and reid because i feel like their convo on the plane was too short/harsh (i get that professionally, reid was out of line but please hotch... he’s struggling with dilaudid lol). if you feel like it, i would love to see your spin on it :)

When they land, everyone reconvenes at the office to check in with Garcia, and then they go their separate ways. Hotch watches Reid from his office, the way he takes his time getting all of his things together and making sure everything on his desk is perfectly placed. He's surprised when, instead of leaving, Reid sits back down and pulls out a stack of papers.

They're the only two left on their floor, and Hotch makes his way down to the bullpen, pulling a chair up next to Spencer.

"I thought you were going to catch that movie," he says conversationally.

"Next showing isn't for a few days," Reid tells him. "It's a special genre of movie. Centers around law enforcement."

His words punch Hotch in the gut. He'd thought about sneaking Reid some information about the Beltway Clean Cops meetings over a year ago, but had chickened out. It's a relief to know that Reid found them anyway, but the feeling of failure on Hotch's end is inescapable.

"Can we talk?" Hotch asks.

"I thought we already did."

"I'd like to talk as Aaron and Spencer this time," he says. "Not as Hotch and Reid."

Spencer looks up, his eyes tired and wary. "Then it depends on what we're talking about. Because I know I messed up and I know you had to reprimand me, but I really can't take any more of that right now. Not tonight." He's fiddling with a coin, the same one he's been holding on the jet.

"Actually, I wanted to ask how you are," Aaron says. "I wanted to make sure you're okay."

"That's nice, Aaron, but you don't have to do this."

"I want to."

Spencer frowns. "Why?"

"You've been on edge lately. I haven't seen you this on-edge in..."

"Ten months."

Aaron can't look at him. "Yes. And when you came in for the case, everyone teased you, and I can't imagine that helped. And then the case itself obviously struck a nerve - several, even - and... Spencer, I don't want you to think your pain isn't important. That it doesn't matter. I don't want you to confuse me scolding you on a professional level with me being upset with you as a person or a friend. Because I'm not. I just want to know if there's anything I can do to help."

"Owen Savage was tortured by kids at school," Spencer says quietly. "I was, too. His body was exposed to the public without his consent. Mine was, too. He tried over and over, and tried so hard, and still failed at school. I did the same thing, only at home. Those aren't things you just recover from."

Aaron nods, sensing that Spencer isn't finished.

"I stopped taking the Dilaudid 10 months ago. That meeting, the one that made me late to the conference room - that's the first one I ever went to. That was the first time I ever sought outside help for my addiction, because the cravings had gotten so bad and I didn't think I could go through that again. I know I can't go through that again. I'm not strong enough."

Spencer looks at Aaron.

"It was a perfect storm of circumstances. Trauma on top of trauma. I'm sorry I behaved unprofessionally, but I'm not sorry for trying to help Owen. A person can only hold it together for so long. If I was going to reach a breaking point, I think there are worse things I could have done than try to talk down a traumatized kid with a gun, and I frankly don't care whether you agree. I'm doing my best, by myself, again."

"I don't want to leave you by yourself again," Aaron says quietly. "I never should have let you go through that alone in the first place. I want you to feel like you can talk to me. And I want you to know that I'm proud of you. I don't agree with the actions you took today, but I understood why you took them. And you could have gone anywhere when the rest of us headed to that cemetery - I'm glad you chose to go and help Owen."

"As if I'd know the first place to score drugs in West Bune, Texas," Spencer says wryly.

"Are we... okay?" Aaron asks hesitantly.

"We will be," Spencer says. "Especially if you feel like giving me a ride home and continuing this conversation."

"Spencer, I'd like nothing more."

#cw drug addiction #cw gun mention #cw bullying mention #cw gore #spencer reid #aaron hotchner #maya writes more than 5 sentences #maya's spencer whump collection

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theoswriting · 4 years ago

Text

fault line [part. i]

summary: To y/n, freedom feels like wind in her hair, sounds like old school rock'n'roll and tastes like Elle's lips. From the fire in front of them comes warmth. With every passing second, bloodied clothes burn beyond the point of recognition.

pairing: elle greenaway x fem!reader

a/n: uhm okay, this totally got out of hand. from that request, my brain went crazy and I ended up having to cut it into two, so this is part 1. Hopefully I'll post part 2 in a couple of days. I feel weird about this story, but I hope you'll enjoy it at least a tiny bit, haha.

warnings: mentions of rape and sexual abuse (nothing graphic), murder but it's pretty lowkey, sociopathy?, bad profiling,

ao3

Jennifer Jareau's steps are hurried when she walks from her office to Hotchner's.

She can feel the eyes of Prentiss, Morgan and Reid following her as she crosses the bullpen. She ignores them, the files she's holding in her hands are far more important. She doesn't wait for an answer after she knocks, not caring that she's interrupting Hotchner in the middle of a phone call.

Hotch doesn't startle at the irruption, and when he sees the urgency in the liaison's eyes, he doesn't hesitate before saying, "I'm afraid I'll have to call later," to whoever was on the other side of the line.

"We have a bad one."

***

To y/n, freedom feels like wind in her hair, sounds like old school rock'n'roll and tastes like Elle's lips.

Elle's hand rests on y/n's thigh as she drives with the other, sunglasses covering her eyes as she stares at the road straight ahead. There's a strength in the way she holds the steering wheel, getting them to their next destination with nothing but confidence. As she looks her over, y/n feels a familiar spark wake inside her. It makes her lean towards the driver's side to drop a long kiss on the corner of Elle's mouth.

Elle doesn't hesitate to turn her head and make it a real kiss, the kind that always leaves y/n breathless and wanting more. When Elle leans back to focus on the road again, the car has swerved to the other side of the road and Elle brings it back to the right lane.

Not that it matters. It's been hours since they had passed another car, not a lot of traffic in the middle of the Nevada desert. And if they were to drive off the road, what a way to go, y/n thinks. She'd happily die twice if it meant dying with Elle kissing her with all the love and passion in the world. That'd probably be the only way y/n would ever make it to heaven.

For now, she leans her head on Elle's shoulder and sighs contentedly at the kiss her girlfriend drops on her temple.

"I think we can stop soon," y/n says after seconds, "We're far out enough, and I really need to stretch my legs."

It's barely fifteen minutes later when y/n finally gets to use her legs after being in the car for so long. As she stretches, Elle stands beside her, drinking from a water bottle. She passes it to her and y/n thanks her. The heat of the desert is heavy around them, but y/n barely feels it.

The warmth comes from the fire in front of them, small and controlled.

With every passing second, bloodied clothes burn beyond the point of recognition.

***

"LAPD called me this morning for a consultation on two cases they suspected might be connected."

Everyone looks at the files as JJ begins presenting the case.

"First victim, Matthew McGregor, 36, was killed with a single gunshot wound to the head a year ago after he came home from a party," She explains, "Second victim, Eric Laurens, 28, two days ago, same M.O., single GSW to the head coming home from a party."

JJ sees Derek nod slowly as he reads over the information again, "Seems pretty clear to me that they're connected."

Emily hums in agreement, "And both had gotten arrested on rape charges, but weren't convicted, prior to their deaths."

"A vigilante?" Rossi theorises out loud.

"There's more," JJ sighs as she clicks on the remote. Five more men appear on screen, a picture from their driver's license and one from a crime scene, "LAPD aren't the only ones who called about similar cases."

Spencer frowns at the screen, "Wyoming, Illinois, New York, these are from all over the country," he observes.

"Yeah" JJ nods, "And the oldest murder goes back to 2007, the most recent being Eric Laurens two days ago."

"That's seven victims over the last 3 years," Derek observes and that's when Hotch gets up to stand next to JJ.

"Seven that we know of," He says, "We might have a transient serial killer in our hands. We'll be flying out to LA to see what we can learn from the most recent crime scene. I've already asked Garcia to look for unsolved murders with a similar M.O. all over the country, we'll debrief more on the jet. Wheels up in 20."

Without another word, all the agents leave the room to gather their belongings and get to the plane that'll take them to their case.

***

After being together for almost four years, y/n and Elle had settled into a routine. It was inevitable, y/n guessed, that after so much time together. Some things were bound to become repetitive.

Elle always takes the left side of the bed, while y/n prefers the right. Elle always cooks if they want their food to be edible, and y/n always cleans up. When it comes to coffee, though, y/n always makes it, Elle's always coming out too strong for both their tastes. When it comes to work, Elle excells at planning while y/n handles the social part.

Their routine is rooted in balance though, and y/n loves the way they compliment each other.

y/n lures the men, Elle shoots them.

She worries sometimes. She worries that their lives are getting boring, that they have settled into this routine too comfortably and forgotten how to surprise each other.

"Mmmh," y/n feels Elle stretch next to her, "G'morning."

Her worries never last very long. How could they, when all y/n has to do is look at Elle to realize that there is no way she's ever falling out of love with the woman.

"Good morning," She replies, getting closer to her girlfriend to drop a kiss on her lips. Elle hums contentedly into the kiss and y/n can't help the grin that takes over her features. When Elle leans back, she keeps her eyes closed and settles back into her pillow and y/n bites her lip as she watches her.

"We need to go soon," Elle mutters.

y/n quickly agrees, even though she's pretty sure no one is on their tails. They can never be too careful. Never stay in a place too long if you don't want to get trapped. They'd stopped in a random motel for the night, paid in cash, left most of their stuff in the car, ready to take off at any time.

It was the way things always were the days that'd follow one of their… projects.

Some would consider this lifestyle tiresome. y/n, however, thinks she's the luckiest person in the world. In the last four years, she's travelled through the country and seen the most beautiful sights with the woman she loves by her side. Sure, they have a job to do, but it's never really felt like a job to y/n. She's always heard that people weren't supposed to enjoy their jobs, that's always what grownups had complained about when she was a kid.

And y/n? Well, she enjoys her job very much.

***

Reid stares at the board in front of him. He's just put up all the information they have so far and it's… a lot.

Or rather, there's very little useful information, but many, many, victims. Garcia has managed to find an overwhelming number of unsolved cases with a similar modus operandi: men, killed by a single gunshot to the head on their way home from a party, all previously accused of rape or sexual misconduct.

They are up to 32 possible victims on top of the 7 they started with, from all over the country. That number only keeps going up the longer Garcia keeps looking.

By now, they are pretty sure all these cases are connected, even though no evidence connects them directly to each other. Even ballistics couldn't link the different shootings.

They're missing something. Spencer only wishes he knew what that was.

On the jet, they'd all agreed on a few things concerning the preliminary profile. Their unsub was most likely highly intelligent and had military or law enforcement training. It was most probably a man in his mid-thirties, carrying out his own justice after the system failed him or someone close to him. He was organized, evident by the lack of clues left behind. Whoever the unsub was, he might even have stalked his victims prior to the crimes.

It sounds right on paper, but something is missing. Spencer knows it.

Something is missing.

***

y/n's hand is wrapped around a cup of coffee as she sits on the patio of a little shop. Her sunglasses are small, barely protecting her from the rays coming from the sun above. It's almost noon.

The world is an ugly place.

That statement had made its way into y/n's head years ago, laying roots, unmoving. With every stroke of her father's anger, with every touch of a man's hands, the roots dug deeper and deeper until they found their way to y/n's heart. The world held no justice for people like y/n. They didn't care about the bruises, the touching, the screaming for help, they never listened.

She had learned a long time ago that if she wants something, she needs to do it herself.

"How can you be married to someone like that?" Elle suddenly speaks up from next to her.

When y/n looks at her, Elle's eyes are fixed onto the man they'd followed. He's at the restaurant on the other side of the street, right in front of the coffee shop. He's sitting with his wife, holding her hand and y/n tilts her head.

"Maybe she doesn't know."

Elle's eyes don't leave the couple, her face still contorted in disgust, "Then, we're doing her a favor."

It brings a smile to y/n's face. The way Elle's voice sounds resolute, confident. It's comforting. It reminds her that she's right to trust Elle, that Elle hates the world just as much as she does and that she'd gladly watch it burn with her. It makes her want to lean in and kiss her, but that would attract too much attention. Instead, she reaches out for her hand and brings it up to her lips. Elle shoots her a small smile, and y/n's heart warms.

It's impressive how a smile from Elle offers y/n a reassurance she hadn't even known she craved. It had always been her against the entire world, the only love she knew was the love she was willing to give to herself. That hadn't always been easy.

Then, she'd met Elle and she had shared a story so different from y/n's but the consequences of it felt familiar. It made sense that y/n had been drawn to her, the strength Elle exuded softened by the understanding y/n saw in her eyes each time she talked.

The world was an ugly place, but Elle Greenaway makes it worth holding on for a little longer.

***

"The body was found right where you're standing," Derek says as he looks back at Prentiss from a few feet ahead, "Which means our unsub must've been standing right here," He adds, pointing to the ground under his feet.

He looks around him as Prentiss voices his exact thought, "There's no way he didn't see the unsub coming. There aren't any good hiding spots out here."

They're standing next to a fence, on the outside of a park, "The sidewalk is big, no trees, or parking allowed, so no cars to hide behind," Derek observes, "Which means our unsub is unsuspecting, someone the victims wouldn't consider a threat."

Emily nods and starts looking up, in search of camera surveillance. Two catch her eye, on the other side of the street and she points out to Derek with a raised eyebrow. Local PD hadn't found anything of use but they decide to call Garcia anyway. If anyone could find something, it was her.

As Morgan talks to their tech analyst, Emily walks past him, then back, retracing the steps their unsub had most likely taken two nights ago. When she stops, she raises her hands, mimicking a gun and aiming at where the victim would've been standing. Whoever it is, they're a good shot which makes her think they were right in saying the unsub had some kind of firearm training.

She sighs as she drops her hands down and puts them on her hips. As she looks around again, a thought crosses her mind, "Where did Mr. Laurens live?"

Derek who just hung up with Garcia wracks his brain to remember the address he'd read in the file, "He lived… three streets down, that way-" He points out to the direction their victim had supposedly been walking from and it dawns on him, "So why was he walking in the opposite direction to his home."

Emily nods, "And how did the unsub know they'd find him here."

"They followed him."

"Walked past him, turned around and shot him?" Emily asks as she walks back to stand where the body had been found.

"Or, he was lured out here," Derek speaks and Prentiss has to agree with him.

"It's the perfect killing spot," She says pointing back at the cameras, "Even if Garcia gets anything from them, it'll be grainy at best, impossible to get a clear shot of our unsub."

Derek looks at the empty street, void of any passerbys, "Quiet street in the day, probably even quieter at night. Less risks to run into an unwanted witness."

"So if he was lured out," Emily says, "We need to figure out who he left that party with."

***

y/n stumbles slightly and giggles as a strong arm wraps around her waist and helps her stay upright.

"Shoot, I'm such a klutz," She adds with a laugh and her companion replies in kind.

His laughter grates on her nerves. It's too loud, resonating all around them and using up too much oxygen. She only has to walk with him a couple more minutes but even that feels too long. She feels his too big hand squeeze her hip and she feels anger spike inside her chest. She wants to hurt him.

Deep breath. Clenched fist. One more minute.

He's started talking again but y/n isn't listening. She's staring straight ahead to the street they're going to walk into where Elle will be waiting for them and the hand will finally fall from her hip. That's when you feel it, that spark you've come to call freedom. It's small but grows as you round the corner with him following you closely.

It starts burning under your skin when you spot Elle's silhouette further down the street.

The man next to you doesn't even take notice of her and isn't that ironic. He spent his life thinking of women as less than and y/n finds it befitting that what'll bring him to his end is the last woman he'll ignore.

Elle raises her gun and with the sound of the gunshot ringing in her ears, y/n's whole body is set aflame.

She watches as the hand lays limp next to his lifeless body and a gleeful laugh escapes her. The hole in his head oozes blood and she can't stop laughing. The hand is laying there unmoving and y/n feels the urge to step on it.

Hurt him, hurt him, hurt him, hurt him like he hurt you.

She's vaguely aware of Elle calling out her name but y/n doesn't snap out of it until a hand yanks her away from the body by the shoulders. She steps back, but slaps the hands touching her away. Only then does she realize that it's Elle looking at her, confusion in her eyes and something y/n doesn't want to ever see from her own girlfriend.

Fear.

"We have to go," Elle announces slowly, like she's explaining it to a child, or a wounded animal. y/n doesn't know which comparison she likes best. She looks back at the body and regretfully nods.

They start walking away, hand in hand, but something inside of y/n doesn't feel quite right. The fire that had roared inside of her is long gone and she feels her body shiver at the cold. Elle notices and wraps an arm around her shoulders, dropping a kiss on her hair as they keep walking side by side.

She wants to smile but she can't manage it.

He hurt her.

He was going to hurt Elle.

He hurt her.

***

"Laurens' friends say he left the party alone," Emily announces to the team as she sits down next to JJ in the conference room. At the same moment, Derek's phone starts ringing, attracting everyone's attention.

"Baby girl, tell me you have good news," Derek answers, putting his phone on speaker so everyone around the table can hear.

"I wish, but no. The cameras on the street were of no use, it's a blind spot. I tried the cameras from neighbouring streets but got nothing. Whoever it is your looking for, they're like a ghost."

There's a collective disappointed sigh and shoulders sagging, and Garcia isn't done, "to make a bad day even worse, a body was just found in Twin Falls, same M.O."

Everyone visibly tenses at the news, Rossi speaking first, "Two kills in less than three days."

Hotch looks at JJ and before he can even say anything, she's out of her seat, "I'll call the local PD, tell them we're on our way."

Hotch nods his approval, turning his stoic gaze to the rest of his team, "Get your bags ready, we're flying out as soon as the jet is ready."

***

It is getting boring and y/n had been right to be worried.

That's the first thing that crosses her mind as she wakes up next to Elle, hours later, in a nameless city in the middle of nowhere.

Elle lays peacefully next to her, deep into slumber, and a smile stretches y/n's lips. She watches her girlfriend's chest rise and fall, her naked body barely covered by the sheets. It's a hot night, y/n can feel the sweat in her lower back making it uncomfortable for her to fall back asleep. As she gets up from the bed, Elle moves, getting closer to where y/n lay seconds ago, chasing the heat despite the already too high temperature.

y/n lets herself watch her for a moment before walking to sit on the chair next to the window. There's nothing to look at, the motel they'd chosen is outside of the city and the lights are barely visible. It's dark, except for the slight light of the moon landing on the cars outside.

She feels empty tonight. The thrill she'd felt hours ago hadn't lasted long and the only thing she could remember about it was the look Elle had thrown her way.

Fear.

Elle had always looked at her with interest. From the moment they met, y/n had been drawn in by her hazel eyes. Something in her made her feel safe in a way she never had before and days after meeting her, she had told Elle about her unpleasant memories, how the world wasn't a nice place.

Elle had listened and, to y/n's surprise, agreed with the statement. Usually, whenever y/n told people about the ugliness of the world, they tried to make her see the parts that weren't so bad, try to make her see that some things, and some people were worth it. Elle hadn't done any of that, she had scoffed and agreed.

"Only person you can trust is yourself. The rest? Always leads to disappointment."

They had ended up in bed together soon after that, spent the night in each other's arms and imagining a world that'd be worth their time.

Two days later, they had killed their first man together.

Their routine hasn't changed in nearly four years, and it used to be enough for y/n. She's the bait, easily transforming herself into whoever the men want to see in front of them. She pretends to be too drunk, unstable on her feet, asking for help to walk back to her place or her car, and the men never think twice before following her.

Elle waits for them and then. She shoots.

And it used to be enough for y/n to watch the proud look on Elle's face anytime she made a perfect shot. Smoking gun in hand and a confident smirk, y/n had never seen anything sexier in her entire life.

What followed was always a passionate kiss and hurried hands, trying to touch every inch of skin.

Earlier, y/n hadn't even kissed Elle, the only contact between them being the arm that Elle had thrown around her shoulder.

y/n can feel that there's something not quite right. She feels it in her body, in the way her arms itch, in the way her chest feels a bit too empty for her too breath comfortably.

y/n loves Elle, there's no way that has changed. She's sure of it. When she turns her head to watch Elle sleep, her heart flutters at the sight of her girlfriend curled up on the side of the bed that she had vacated. She couldn't see it, but she could picture her girlfriend's face, mouth slightly open if she were to believe the little snores she could hear.

She is just bored of the routine.

When she finally climbs back into bed with Elle, her girlfriend automatically drapes a hand over her waist.

"Where did you go?" Elle asks sleepily, and y/n lays a kiss on her nose. It makes her scrunch up her face and that's the cutest sight she's ever seen.

"Couldn't sleep."

Elle hums and goes back to sleep. y/n sighs and follows suit, not long after.

***

"What's this, on the palm?" Morgan asks the M.E., pointing at the left hand of the victim where the skin seems slightly bruised.

The doctor on the other side of the autopsy table nods at Derek and Spencer, "His hand was broken post-mortem, although I'm having a hard time figuring out what broke it."

Reid leaned closer to the hand and frowned, "It looks like something was pushed from the palm to the other side."

Again, the doctor nods, but before she can say anything else, Reid suddenly stands up straight and looks over at Morgan, "I know what did this."

At that moment, Morgan's phone rings and upon seeing Hotch's name, he excuses himself to reply. When he comes back, his face looks somber.

"A man was killed not far from here, local PD just got the call. Hotch wants us to check it out, just in case."

#elle greenaway x reader #elle greenaway #elle greenaway imagine #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds x reader #elle greenaway x you #elle greenaway x y/n #criminal minds

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stxrrywildflower · 4 years ago

Text

vigilante

pairing - bau team x teen!reader

summary - the team meets one of the most reputable vigilantes during a case, suprisingly, it’s someone they least expect

warnings - mentions of case, cursing, past death, abuse

word count - ?

when you were 15, your parents were shot and killed right in front of you. as cliché as it sounds, that was the start of you story.

after moving in with a relative, you started online school. from that moment on, you trained and took the law into your own hands. sure, it was partially illegal and there were a lot of questions from your family, but, you couldn’t sit around in your city and watch other people suffer just as you did. you were currently 17 and as strong as ever with no plans of slowing down. especially with the severity of the most recent crime.

your signature was a spade. whether on a card or a piece of paper, it was at ever crime scene letting the police know you had helped.

this case was like no other. one man or woman, you weren’t quite sure yet, was murdering victims of all age ranges throughout town. after the second body was found, you began your own personal investigation. the way you worked was going to crime scenes either before or after the police were there and found whatever you could. there were a ton of times you found clues and either called in an anonymous tip or wrote it down on paper.

the bau team landed down in pittsburgh after a fairly short flight. the local police department had called the team in once more victims had turned up. the victimology was all over the place and they needed to find every possible ounce of information.

“we have an anonymous tip line but our usual caller hasn’t given us anything. other than that, you can set up in the conference room and boards are in there too,” the deputy announced. hotch was the one who thanked him while the team headed into the conference room.

“usual caller?” j.j. whispered to morgan who then shrugged. “who knows. could just be some local crime fan,” the agent responded. with that, the bau team went to work.

for the next two days the team and police force worked tirelessly to find something that would help them catch the killer. but alas, absolutely nothing. no calls on the tip line and no new bodies found. that was, until they had caught you.

“some jogger just reported some suspicious activity. said they saw someone in the alley on the ground with another person standing over them. it’s a stretch but it could be something. i’ve already sent some officers out,” the deputy alerted.

“alright, keep us informed if they find anything,” hotch responded.

it was a bit unusual for hotch to not send anyone to the potential crime scene but that was just it, it was only a possible scene.

it couldn’t have been more than ten minutes later when a few cops walked in. all heads shot up for one reason. they were pushing along a teenage girl in handcuffs.

you were dressed in black jeans with a black and white plaid jacket. combat boots were your choice of shoes accompanied by a beanie on your head. you looked exactly like the rebellious teenager in some movie. your knuckles were bruised pretty badly and you had a small cut on your lip. the team was obviously shocked to see that an arrest was made, nonetheless a teenager.

“who is she?” rossi asked.

“y/n y/l/n. we found her at the crime scene with the body,” the deputy explained.

“where are her parents?”

“she lives with one of her relatives. they have been notified but are choosing to let us deal with the situation since they are on a trip.”

“and you think she did it?” hotch questioned just as you were led to one of the interrogation rooms.

“all i’m saying is that she has motive. her parents died a few years back during a home invasion. adding on the bruises and the fact that she was found with the body, it’s a possibility.”

“prentiss and rossi, head down to the crime scene and examine the body. if you don’t mind i would like to speak with her,” hotch spoke. upon seeing a nod from the deputy, he followed him back to the room you were in. the rest of the team stood outside of window, peering in to watch the interrogation that was about to go down.

meanwhile, you sat back in your chair, keeping your head low as you moved the handcuffs back and forth across the bar on the table they were attached to. the cops had already searched you for weapons, not like you had any.

when the door opened to the interrogation room, you didn’t even bother looking up all the way. out of the corner of your eye, you did see two men walking in. one was the deputy, you recognized him, but the other you had never even seen before.

a file folder with the fbi logo and bold lettering was then placed on the table. your eyes widened slightly, maybe you were in more trouble than you thought. you hadn’t intended to be caught, that was obvious, but the police arrived and reprimanded you even before you could formulate a plan.

“do you know what this is?” the deputy spoke harshly.

the still mystery man held his hand out as a way to tell the deputy to stand down. “hi y/n, i’m agent hotchner with the bau profiling team. would it be okay to ask you some questions?” hotchner asked. you nodded slightly.

“what were you doing at the crime scene?” hotch questioned outright.

“i was investigating mr. hotchner,” you answered plainly.

“you were investigating a dead body? sounds like bullshit to me,” the deputy butted in. it didn’t take a profiler to know that he was becoming restless with the case.

“don’t you want to know who i am?” you snapped.

“i know who you are y/n. you’re on the wrong side of the law and a suspect in a series of murders,” the deputy responded.

“honestly you couldn’t be more wrong dan,” you spat, using the deputy’s first name. with the limited mobility you had, you reached into your coat pocket. both of the men in the room visibly tensed. “relax, i’ve already been searched.”

you tossed the familiar spade card onto the table before sitting back and resuming your motion of staring down.

hotch looked towards the deputy who swallowed nervously and scrambled to grab the card. the fbi agent furrowed his eyebrows in confusion as he motioned for the deputy to follow him. after the door slammed shut, you were left in complete silence.

“what was that?” hotch asked the second they exited the interrogation room. the rest of the bau team had witnessed the encounter and joined the two men for answers.

“ever since a year-and-a-half ago, we’ve gotten calls and been given clues through that as well as at crime scenes. at first we thought it could be a potential signature of the criminal but after a couple cases, we realized that this person was actually helping solve these cases and finding clues we couldn’t even see. i never would have thought it would be a teenager,” the deputy responded.

“how does y/n manage to do all that?” emily spoke up. “we’re not sure. she’s always managed to be there either before we get there or even after we leave.”

“if y/n has been investigating the crime scenes, she may have seen the unsub without even realizing it,” rossi added. “that’s true, though i’m not sure she’ll be willing to talk after that.” the teams eyes all drifted to the one-way glass were you still sat, head down and running your fingers over your bruises.

you eventually lost track of the time you spent in the interrogation room. but, by your judgment, it was around three hours. a blonde woman was the first to enter the room. she sat down at the table for a moment, introduced herself, before offering you water.

“no thank you mrs. jareau,” you had replied.

the second agent to enter immediately tried to make feel more comfortable despite the situation you were in. you had to admit, the terrible jokes he told did make you smile slightly. he offered you water too. just like with j.j., you replied with “no thank you mr. morgan.”

with the responses you gave, the team decided to regroup without the pressure of the local police department. “did you notice how y/n addressed the deputy by the first name but all j.j. and morgan as mrs. and mr.?” spencer commented.

“the deputy did mention that she has a history with the police department,” hotch started before returning to morgan, “call garcia and have her fly in. y/n can relate to her the most.” morgan nodded at hotch’s request before exiting the room to call the tech genius.

you bounced your leg out of pure nervousness. a significant amount of time had gone since morgan had talked to you. just as you were starting to realize that they could only hold you for a certain amount of time, the door opened once again.

in walked another blonde woman, this time with bright clothes and accessories on. she sat down at the seat across from you and pulled a laptop out of her bag. you finally met her sympathetic gaze. “are you another fbi agent?” you asked softly.

“oh no, i wouldn’t last five minutes in the field. well my name is penelope garcia, i’m the technical analyst for the team.”

“and they called you in to talk to me? with all due respect ms. garcia, why are you here?” you responded. “okay, first things first, you can call me penelope. second, i can get those handcuffs off for you. i’m sure they’re hurting,” penelope offered.

once your wrists were released, you rubbed them as they had become red from being detained. “i know you really don’t want to talk about what happened but we do really need your help catching the criminals who did this,” penelope spoke. “like i said before, why are you here,” you added emphasis on the ‘you’.

“i have a past like you. i was my own type of vigilant after i lost my parents.”

while you knew penelope meant well with that sentence, you couldn’t help but grow angry. “you know nothing about me,” you seethed. penelope was slightly taken aback by your reaction and tone.

“my parents died because some deadbeat cops were out drinking instead of responding to my call. why do you think i do what i do?” you practically yelled, “i take the law into my own hands so people don’t have to suffer the same way i did.”

the second you were done your slight outburst, morgan walked in. you collapsed back in your chair. “derek i’m fine. you don’t need to be in here,” penelope whispered, hoping you wouldn’t hear. you did, however. “alright. i’m still going to stay in here if you don’t mind,” derek responded.

there was a slightly awkward silence that fell over the room. neither penelope or derek really knew what to say to you. they had both seen how you reacted to penelope trying to connect to you.

“it’s not like my family knows or cares. i don’t even know if i should really call them that. i was only taken in because they pretty much had too,” you grumbled.

both derek and penelope noticed you flinch at the mention of your family. and the bruises you acquired were never revealed how you got them.

“honey are they hurting you?” penelope asked softly.

tears slowly began to trickle down your cheeks. you held your hands close to your chest as the full on sobs started. in an instant, penelope was moving her chair over to sit by your side. “a group of hackers became my family after my parents died. stayed with them for awhile before i was recruited by the fbi and found such an amazing and loving team. it does get better, i promise you,” penelope offered.

you stayed like that for a few moments, just leaning into penelope’s side as she wrapped a comforting arm around you. “i’ll talk to mr. hotchner again. see if anything i concluded can help you,” you spoke.

with one final squeeze to your shoulder, penelope stood up and left the interrogation room with derek. hotch replaced the two, handing you a file for the second time that day. you took a deep breath before relaying all the information you had found out.

meanwhile, on the outside, penelope was close to tears. “her family is hurting her derek. people who are supposed to love and protect her are hurting her!” garcia exclaimed. morgan walked over and took her hands in his. “hey, baby girl. i need you to calm down. we’ll figure out a way to help her. but right now, we need your head in the case. reid and prentiss have some names for you to run. can you do that for me?” morgan asked. penelope nodded and got to work.

____

you were released from custody when you were done speaking with hotch.

the information provided was more then helpful. there had been a few key details that even the profilers had missed. they all wondered what you would see if another body did in fact turn up. a card with everyone’s phone numbers on it was provided to you incase you needed anything or they needed help. penelope had offered to stay with you. you had accepted, mostly because you didn’t want to be alone and she wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

when you and penelope were having breakfast the following morning, her phone had began to ring. “another one?” you questioned when she hug you.

“yeah. hotch requested your help. just as another consult,” penelope smiled slightly. you nodded as a way to agree, just because you were caught and revealed some things about yourself didn’t mean you were going to stop from doing what you always did.

morgan picked you up from your house. as you got into the back and penelope into the front seat, morgan leaned back and handed you a coat. “what’s this?” you asked. “if your going to be on the crime scene with us, you’re going to need some identification.” you simply shrugged and slipped on the jacket. big bold yellow letters spelling out ‘fbi’ were on the back making you let out a breath.

on the crime scene, you and morgan ducked under the police tape and walked over to the sheet covering the body. just as you kneeled down, the team all glanced around at each other.

never in a million years would they have thought they would be using a teenager in an fbi jacket as a consult.

you gave everything you knew to hotch before going back to the car to sit with penelope. “so, any plans for school?” she asked, trying to start a conversation. “i’m not really sure if i want to go to college. not even sure if i could get in.” penelope frowned, unsatisfied with your answer.

the unsub was caught four days later, your clues giving the final push to identify the killer. you were back at home with penelope as the team was finishing up at the police station. before departing, she would need to pack up all of her stuff.

“before i go, i want to talk to you about something. now just listen first. i’ve may have done a thing and figured out a way to get you out of this home. it’s a little confusing to explain but it’s only a fact that you can’t be here anymore,” penelope spoke.

“pen-” you started, “where am i even supposed to go?”

“that’s the best part. if you agreed, we can bring you to d.c. with us and you can be our under my care until your 18. my team travels all the time but i stay in the office to do my work. if you agree, we can get you into a good school or even just a stable job. you’re incredibly talented, i’m sure it want be a challenge.”

tears began to well up in your eyes. “you really want to take care of me?” you choked out. penelope nodded with a grin before pulling you into a tight hug. “this sounds a little suspicious,” you laughed.

“yeah well i’m a hacker. i’ll do anything to help people out,” penelope replied.

it was absolutely crazy that all it took for a teenage vigilante to find a new family was just to be caught. and honestly, it was well worth it.

#criminal #criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid x oc #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #derek morgan #emily prentiss #emily prentiss x reader #jennifer jareau #david rossi #penelope garcia #bau team #bau team x teen reader #teen reader

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g0ldengubler · 4 years ago

Text

chapter 9 ~ ...and the after party

A/N: i’m baaaaaccckkkk! i hope u guys enjoy this chapter and expect 10 coming soon! also thank you guys for almost 600 followers! that’s insane i love u guys🥺🥺 get ready for the one shot coming right after this ;) (also i will fix this so it has the keep reading part sometime this week i’m on my phone lol)

Category: smut (NSFW18+)

CW: use of cannabis, hangover, lots of smut at the end.

Word Count: 2598

✨masterlist✨

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were awoken by the feeling of arms wrapping around you as the pounding in your head grew. Taking Spencer's hand, you covered your eyes thinking it would calm it down a bit as you thought back to last night. You couldn't remember much, but you did remember feeling happy and content, being surrounded by people you could actually call family and not feel the need the hold back anything about you. You remember feeling free, whether that was the alcohol talking or not. You've only known Spencer and the team for only a short time, and through that, you've gotten to know Spencer at, what felt like, a deeper level. That was something you never really could do or feel, growing up - to feel like you belonged.

Carefully moving his hand back to where it was before, you let your eyes flutter open as the pounding got worse. You looked around the room to see that you and Spencer had taken the couch and you were the first one awake. You saw Emily and Jj passed out on the floor, their heads on pillows and blankets wrapped around them. You figured that Garcia and Morgan were asleep in her room, as the two couldn't take their hands off each other last night, and Hotch had passed out on the recliner, his snoring being the loudest of them all which didn't surprise you until you realized you got wasted with your boss. You chuckle softly to yourself, knowing that this would be one hell of a story to tell in the future, hell maybe even tell Seth when you got back.

You felt the body next to you shift and looked to your right, seeing a sleepy Dr.Reid rubbing the sand out of his eyes. As he shifted the weight of his body onto his elbow, he smiled when he saw you before putting a hand on his head.

"How much did I drink last night?" He asked.

"Good morning to you, too." You said before leaning over and kissing his forehead.

Spencer wraps his arm around you and pulls you in closer. As the two of you talked about what you remembered, everyone started to wake up one by one, joining in on the conversation. Garcia came in before Morgan woke up and made everyone tea and gave each one of you some advil for the headaches.

"Where did Rossi go?" asked Jj.

"Rossi already had an Uber ready to pick him up from the bar," said Hotch, "I just checked my phone and he had texted me when he got home."

"Anyone up for food?" asked Emily, "I'm starving!"

"Anyone have any plans today?" asked Garcia.

Everyone shook their heads. "I haven't even thought that far since we got back from Michigan." you said.

''Good! Because I already had something in mind."

"You always do, baby girl." jokes Morgan, which made everyone chuckle to themselves.

She looks around the room as an evil grin grew on her face. All but Morgan were confused. "Ok, no," he says, "I don't think anyone would want to do that, especially Hotch."

"What wouldn't I want to do?" asked Hotch, looking even more confused than before.

Morgan sighs before speaking, as if he didn't want to say this in front of him. "Garcia has been wanting everyone over for a "proper smoke sesh", not like the last time. She's been like this ever since she got these new hemp blunt wraps."

"They're healthier than normal ones," she said, looking a little annoyed with Morgan, "they're better than getting leftover tobacco and nicotine in your system."

Hotch sat there for a moment, sipping on his tea while thinking about it. He put his thumb under his chin and his index finger on top, going through the scenarios and the pros and cons. "I mean," he spoke, "Jessica still has Jack over at Hershey Park from their weekend vacation, and I wouldn't have to be back until tomorrow...."

"...So is that a yes?" asked Emily.

There a was a pause for a moment, and in that moment you could feel the unnecessary tension in the room.

"...yeah I'll stay for tonight," he confesses, "but we do NOT talk about this with anyone else. I haven't smoked weed since college."

"Didn't you go to law school, though?" asked Spencer.

"How do you think we got through law school?"

Everyone cheered jokingly and laughed at the fact that their boss was getting high with them. Never did you think that within the beginning of your time with the BAU, you came at a time where the whole team was given their first uninterrupted, paid vacation that desperately needed, and was able to find love and do things you didn't think they'd do. You knew this night was going to be even more interesting than last night.

____

Something about getting high with others made you feel it more than usual. Could've been because it's more fun with more people, but that train of thought faded into the fog of your brain as your attention shifted to the cards in front of you. That night, Garcia had rolled the blunt and everyone passed it around until it was a roach, Hotch having a coughing fit at one point, but she had made her way to her room after and had the box of Cards Against Humanity in one hand and a bong and grinder in her other. Spencer cracked up the most out of all of you when Hotch had his coughing fit, you couldn't tell what was funnier.

As Changes by David Bowie played in the background, you were enjoying your own little version of the game. Whoever lost the round had to take a bong rip, and boy was Hotch having a rough night as he couldn't seem to get a win.

It came to the final round, and you and Spencer were tied on 9 black cards. The black card was, 'When I was tripping on acid, ____ turned into ____', and it was Jj's turn to pick. She luckily narrowed it down to two cards, one of them being yours. As she read them allowed, you noticed that she laughed at yours a little more than the other one. She ended up choosing yours and you cheered that you won the game, deciding that you wanted to take a victory rip. As you exhaled without choking, you caught Spencer out of the corner of your eye rolling his, which you pretended to ignore.

You lay back on the couch afterward and snuggled into Spencer as he wrapped an arm around you. Everyone talked amongst themselves, eating the snacks that were placed out on the coffee table. You felt Spencer lean in as he whispered, "That's not how you were last time," he said "you were completely gagging."

"Are you just jealous that you choked when you took a bong rip?" You teased. You knew where this was going, but you hoped that he had a plan and where to go.

Spencer looks around the room before leaning back to your ear. "Where it all started," he said, "follow 5 minutes after me and if anyone asks you're going to the bathroom, clear angel?"

You simply nod as you watch him get up. You pretend to look at your phone, keeping your head down, but you would look up a little bit to watch him stumble his way. After five minutes you get up and head to Garcia's room, where you see Spencer spread out on the bed looking up at the stars, just like that night.

"Well well well," You said after shutting the door, "someone looks spaced out." You sit next to him on the bed, where he sits up on his shoulder.

Spencer pushes a strand of hair out of your face smiling. "Nice one," he says, "but I'm going to be honest, I think we should skip all the foreplay."

He pushes you down on the bed as he gets on top of you. You felt the air leave your body as his lips went straight for your neck, devouring the blank space. "I need you so bad, y/n," Spencer says breathless, "it was hard hiding myself after in front of everyone as you took those rips. I couldn't stop thinking about pounding you."

"Well get to it then, daddy." You said as innocently as you could, palming him through his pants.

That was the push he needed. He quickly ripped off your jeans with your panties going with as you ripped him out of his. You saw his cock hit his stomach and you couldn't hold in your moan. Spencer quickly covered your mouth shushing you. "I know they have Bowie going on repeat, but I don't think it'll cover our beautiful voices, however. Can you be a good girl and try to be quieter?"

Muffled, you say yes. Spencer moves you up higher on the bed so your head could rest on the pillows. He doesn't even tease your entrance as he pushes all the way into you. Your jaw hits the mattress as you let out a silent scream. He wouldn't even let you adjust as he quickly moves inside you.

"Fuck daddy it feels so good!" You moan out.

"You're so fucking tight, angel...And so wet-fuck...You like being fucked like a slut, hm? You like getting pounded into the mattress like this?"

"Yes yes yes yessss!"

He leans down and lifts your shirt up, showing that you weren't wearing a bra as your tits glow in the moonlight. He tsks at no bra before letting it slide and attaches his mouth to your right nipple. Your fingers tangle in his hair as he flicks your nipple with his tongue, intoxicated by the amount of pleasure you were feeling.

Shortly after, you felt the pressure in your lower stomach start to drop and you tighten your grip around his cock and he lets out groan.

"You getting close, angel?" He asks.

"Please let me cum daddy, please please please!" You beg.

He grabs the headboard with his left as he used his right for support, pounding you even harder and harder. Your grip on him tighten even more, making him tilt his head back at the friction.

"Cum for me angel, be a good girl and cum so hard all over my cock."

You throw a pillow over your face in fear of the other's finding out. You felt like you were screaming at the top of your lungs as he helped ride out your orgasm, but he didn't stop. He kept going at it, railing you to the mattress. You could feel yourself getting more and more sensitive as he kept going at it. You looked up to see him still holding onto the headboard as he throws his head back in pleasure. It was so hot to you that you felt yourself getting close again.

"Ca-I can't...take it daddy!" You whimper out.

Spencer looks down at you and gives you an evil grin as he chuckled to himself. "You can...and you will." He shuts his eyes tight and almost lets his jaw fall open as he felt you grip tightly to his cock again before saying, " I'm so close angel. You want me to cum in you?"

"Yes daddy pleeeasssee fill me up with all your cum!" You moan.

With a few more hard thrusts, they started to get sloppy as you felt him coat your walls and heard him moan and groan in your ear, cursing under his breath. Spencer falls on top of you as he finishes, trying to catch his breath. He falls to the side of you and watches his cum pool out of you.

Spencer's POV~

"You did so good, y/n," I say breathlessly, leaning down and showering her body in kisses. She immediately snuggled herself into my body, forcing me to wrap an arm around her. I think she knew the sex was great, and she told me she loved getting fucked like that, but I could tell she was falling as the vulnerability was starting to peak through.

"Hey," I say as I pepper her cheek in kisses, "You were such a good girl. Do you want me to get you anything? Water? Your pen?"

"Can you clean me up for now," She asks in a small voice, "I'm ok. Just let me try to stand first."

As she goes up to stand, she falls right back down to the bed. I tried to holding in my laughter as she kept trying before stopping her. "It's ok, let me go get something to clean you up and then we'll go back out there, ok?"

"Thank you Spence." She says, trying to hold back tears of embarrassment. I reach over and wipe a tear away from her face.

As I shut the door behind me to get a wipe from the bathroom, I noticed that everything was quiet. Too quiet. Not being able to find wipes in the bathroom, I slowly but casually (or as casually as I could act) walked to the kitchen. I couldn't even make it there as I froze where I stood in the living room, eyes darting on me with a few small grins poking out. I look at his team, as they look right back at me. It was Hotch who finally broke the tension in the air and started cracking up. No words, just laughter. Soon everyone else joined in, myself only giving small giggles and chuckles.

"You heard?"

"You're full of surprises, kid!" said Emily.

"That was you in there?" Morgan asked jokingly, "You. Pretty Rickey. You were saying all of that shit....Why do I feel like I need to learn from you now?"

That made Hotch laugh even more as he burst into another fit. Everyone looked over to him, some confused, some worried.

"Is he ok?" I asked.

Jj pats the top of his head and shook hers. "He'll be fine, he's gonna pass out any minute now."

"Where's y/n? Is she ok?" asked Garcia.

"Yeah she umm..." I was trying to think of the words to use but finally I just came out and said, "...Do you umm..have any wipes, Garcia? She's ok, she just uhh...can't get up without falling back on the bed."

As I gave my classic white, awkward smile, Garcia shook her head and told me she would take care of her. She grabs an ice pack from her freezer and then went over to her purse and grab a packet of baby wipes. She walks over to the hallway before stoping in front of me, making me nervous.

"Did you really have to have rough sex on my bed?"

"I mean, you and Morgan proba-"

"Never mind, just don't talk about it again."

She walks off pass me hurrying to y/n's aid. I look over to Morgan and he just chucked, motioning me to come sit next to him. I walk over and sit down, Morgan handing me the joint they were passing around. Hotch had finally passed out like Jj had said, and Emily put the music back on. I knew there were a lot of questions I wanted to ask, but I decided to save them for tomorrow as I continued to enjoy the night, waiting for y/n to come back out so I could hold her close and give her all my love after ruining her like that.

#spencer reid #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fanfiction #mgg #matthew gray gubler #criminal minds #criminal minds smut #criminal minds fanfiction

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recollins · 4 years ago

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hi! can you do one of reid and he has a secret girlfriend/fiance/wife (idk your choice haha) that the team doesnt know about then something happens to spencer (hospital maybe) or the team meets her by chance and everyone is surprised and start piecing together why reid declined to go out all those times and stuff? you have free reign over this drabble I know it'll turn out great anyways! thanks!!

Of course! This is so cute! Sorry, I know this took a hot minute, but I apparently don’t have the ability to write short drabbles (and of course my internet went out for like an hour when I was ready to post 🙄). I hope you don’t mind it went a little long, hopefully you enjoy this!

Pairing: Spencer x Female Reader Words: 3,531 Content: Fluff Warnings: Knife injury, stitches Masterlist

The tentative hand tugging on your pencil skirt was right on time. With a smile, you sat the stack of book returns on the shelf and turned to smile at your favorite visitor. As soon as she saw she had your attention, June held up the most recent book you’d recommended to her, beaming as she said excitedly,

“Zero found his mom! I was happy he was gonna live with Stanley but now he has his her too!”

“See? And you were worried it wasn’t gonna be a happy ending,” you teased the enthusiastic seven-year-old as you crouched down to her level. “Did you like it?”

June nodded enthusiastically, her blonde curls bouncing wildly with the movement. “I loved it! I would’a been so scared with all those lizards though! I don’t know how Zero and Stanley were so brave!”

“It’s not easy to be brave, but doing the right thing can show you that you’re a lot stronger than you might believe,” you told her, and to your surprise you saw uncertainty clouding her soft blue eyes.

“Miss (Y/N), do you think I could be brave?”

You nodded and reached up giving her chin a gentle squeeze before you stood. “You already are. I mean, you walk here from school every day by yourself. That’s pretty brave, if you ask me.”

To your surprise, June dropped her eyes and gave her small shoulders a dismissive shrug. “I’m not as brave as my big brother. He can climb all the way to the top of our tree and I’m too scared to even go past the first branch.”

As you did every Wednesday, you rested a hand on June’s shoulder and led her with you over to the children’s section of the library. Instead of instantly taking her to seek out a new book for the week, you led her to the reading nook and nudged her towards one of the chairs as you sat across from her.

“You remember Dr. Reid, don’t you?” you prompted, and June’s smile flickered back to her face as she gave an eager nod. How could she not? Spencer had come by the Story Circle – a kids book club you hosted every Saturday – and had eagerly joined in on your discussion of that month’s book, The Hobbit.

Though not [as] gifted as Spencer Reid (honestly, you didn’t think anyone else really was), June was an incredibly smart little girl and read well over her normal age group. It turned out that The Hobbit was one of her favorite books, and she and Spencer had spent hours talking about it after the club had ended.

“Well, he’s an FBI agent. Remember?” June nodded again. “Do you think he’s brave?”

“He is,” she confirmed instantly, and a smile came to your face. “He’s probably the bravest person ever!”

“I think so too,” you admitted, grinning back at her. But you think your brother’s pretty brave too, huh?”

June nodded, a little slower this time, trying to figure out the point you were about to make. “But he’s not an FBI agent like Dr. Reid.”

“He’s not. But he can still be brave, because there are different kinds of braveness in the world. Dr. Reid goes out and finds bad guys, and your brother can climb trees and not get scared.” June’s brow furrowed as you added pointedly, “and you walk all the way to the library by yourself. Everyone’s brave in their own way, but Dr. Reid’s bravery isn’t any different from yours. They’re all just as important, and all just as impressive.”

June’s smile took up her whole face, and to your surprise she hopped off her chair and rushed over to hug you tight. You laughed and hugged her back as she said, “thank you Miss (Y/N). you know what?” You pulled back and raised a brow at her in question. “You’re just like Gandalf. You’re wise and you always say things that make other people feel better. Like he does with Bilbo!”

You laughed with her as you got to your feet, taking her hand to lead her towards the shelves you wanted. “So then does that make you Bilbo?”

“Uh-huh. And Dr. Reid is Thorin, ‘cause he’s really smart and clever, but he’s really nice too. And he’s a leader. And he’s probably brave enough to fight Smaug.”

“I bet you’re right,” you agreed, already looking forward to telling Spencer all about this tonight. He loves little kids, and knowing June thought about him so highly would definitely make his day. “You know, speaking of bravery and dragons… I think I know a good book for you this week.”

You paused at the end of one of the aisles and knelt down – June following your movement – and you tugged out a book you’d been waiting to recommend to her. She took your offering and studied the cover as she read out,

“The Two Princesses of Bamarre?”

“Yep. Do you remember reading Ella Enchanted last month?” June nodded slowly. “This was written by the same author. It’s about a little sister who has to be really brave and go on an adventure to save her big sister. There’s dragons, ogres, and fairies in this one.”

June’s eyes widened with every word, and as you both stood she peeked up at you. “And true love?”

That was what the two of you shared – you were both hopeless romantics.

“Would I give you a fairytale story without that?” June giggled and shook her head. You nudged her gently back towards the reading nook, knowing her mom wouldn’t be by to pick her up for another hour at least. “I’ve got to finish putting the books away, so you get started on that and see if you like it, alright?”

“Thanks Miss (Y/N)!” she said eagerly, already cracking the book open on her way. You just grinned and shook your head as you headed back to the books you’d left on the shelf. The front desk phone ringing hadn’t even caught your attention, and you were just grabbing the books again when the other librarian Amy came bustling over to you, handset held out.

“It’s Stafford Hospital asking for you,” she whispered, and instantly your stomach flipped. Why was a hospital several cities over be calling for you? Warily you took the handset and said,

“This is (Y/F/N) (Y/L/N).”

“Miss (Y/L/N), this is Nurse Lesser from Stafford Hospital. We’re calling you because you’re listed as the emergency medical contact for Spencer Reid.”

You nearly dropped the phone, sucking in a sharp breath as your heart skittered to a stop. “Oh my god, is he okay?”

“I’m sorry ma’am, I’m not able to go into specifics right now, but if you’d be able to come down and speak with –“

“Yes, yes, I’m on my way,” you said quickly, already racing for the front desk. As soon as the call ended you practically threw the handset back to Amy as you grabbed your purse. “I’ve got to go, I’m so sorry. I’ll see you later!”

Amy didn’t even get a chance to respond before you were booking it to your car.

The normally fifteen minute drive to the hospital took you less than ten; you’d be sure not to ever mention how many traffic laws you’d broken to get there so fast. Not that you really cared about that, though. Your mind was in overdrive, heart stuttering painfully against your ribs, lungs refusing to let you get a full breath. All you could hear was emergency medical contact for Spencer Reid.

Heels and all, you practically sprinted through the ER parking lot, desperate to find out what had happened. You and Spencer had been dating for just about five months now, and though he’d listed you as his contact as soon as you’d made things official, this was the first call you’d ever gotten for it. You knew dating an FBI agent came with risks like this, but you really hadn’t been prepared for the instant panic and fear that came with knowing Spencer had been hurt.

Once inside, though, you had no idea where to go or what to do. Maybe you should’ve thought to ask that during the call, but you’d flown into panic hyperdrive and had been on a one-track-mind purpose of getting to your boyfriend as fast as possible.

You paused in the lobby for several moments, looking around desperately until you spotted someone that looked like a nurse.

“Excuse me!” you called, racing after him. The young man paused and looked back at you as you asked quickly, “I-I got a call. I’m an emergency contact for a patient –“

“Which patient, ma’am?” he asked, glancing down at a clipboard in his hand.

“Dr. Spencer Reid. He’s with the FBI, I don’t know – they wouldn’t tell me what’s wrong –“

“I’m sorry ma’am, he’s not one of my patients. If you want to wait in the lobby –“

“You don’t understand. I need to know – can you just please find out where he is? Spencer Reid. R-E-I-D. They just called me –“

“I’m sorry, did you say Spencer Reid?” a woman asked from behind you. As soon as you were distracted the nurse practically bolted from your side, but you were too busy studying the group of people behind you.

The woman who had spoken – a petite, beautiful blonde – was coming up to you, confused concern on her face. You recognized her instantly from Spencer’s description of his team, and for a moment you worried he’d be upset. He hadn’t wanted you to meet his coworkers just yet – and certainly not like this – but right now that didn’t matter.

“You must be JJ,” you started, not missing the blink of alarm she gave you as she nodded slowly.

“Yeah… I am. I’m sorry, who are you?”

Oh, right. That had probably been a lot creepier than you’d meant.

“No, I’m sorry. That was super weird of me. I’m (Y/F/N) (Y/L/N), Spencer’s girlfriend. He’s told me all about you guys.”

JJ and the others behind her all made noises of surprise. One of the men you recognized as Derek Morgan actually choked on his coffee as he spluttered, “I’m sorry, you’re what now?!”

Heat flooded your cheeks when you realized everyone was staring at you like you’d just sprouted a second head. Nervously you brought your hands together in front of you, fingers twisting together as you repeated a little quieter, “um, I’m Spencer’s girlfriend?”

“Spencer has a –“ a beautiful dark-haired woman scoffed, mouth hanging open as she tried to think of a way to finish that sentence. She must be Emily. “I had no idea Spencer had a girlfriend.”

“Surprise?” you offered, almost instantly cringing at how stupid that was. Thankfully, one of the older men seated behind the others gave an amused snort. Derek, Emily, and JJ all turned to stare at him as Emily asked incredulously,

“What, did you know about this, Rossi?”

“Of course not,” the man – apparently David Rossi – scoffed as he nodded at you. “But unlike you all it doesn’t surprise me that our resident genius would be dating a beautiful librarian. It doesn’t get any more Spencer Reid than that.”

Your cheeks were burning now as the others made noises of agreement. The last man to speak stepped forward and held out his hand to you.

“As I assume you already know, I’m Aaron Hotchner.”

“Spencer’s unit chief,” you confirmed, shaking his hand. “Though I never pictured it like this, it’s really great to meet you all finally.”

“It’s great to know you exist,” Derek quipped; Emily smacked his arm.

“You don’t know why Spence is here?” JJ prompted, and the surprise of meeting your boyfriend’s team flickered out the moment you remembered why you were here. At the look you gave her she said quickly, “don’t worry, he’s fine. He was cut by an UnSub we were chasing and he needed some stitches. We’re just waiting for the doctor to give us the clear to see him.”

Rossi patted the chair beside him and invited, “you’re more than welcome to sit with us, if we haven’t scared you off.”

“Of course not,” you smiled, taking him up on his offer and settling beside him. The others gathered a little closer, clearly ready to learn more about you. Derek wasted no time on jumping into the questions.

“So (Y/N), how long have you and Reid been dating?”

“Five months on the 18th,” you told him with a smile. His eyes widened in surprise and he made a noise of absolute shock.

“You’ve been datin’ for almost half a year and we didn’t know you existed?!”

“Um, surprise again?” you offered, getting a snort out of JJ this time. “I’m sorry. Spencer said he was waiting for the right time. He wanted to give us time to get comfortable with our relationship and make sure things were serious, and then things have just kept coming up. He definitely didn’t want to spring it on you like… well, exactly like it just happened…”

“He was going to tell us at the Halloween party, wasn’t he?” Emily asked you, and at the bewildered head nod you gave her she explained, “he was insistent we would all be there, and when we had to fly out on a case he was really upset. I thought it was just because he has an unnatural love for Halloween, but…”

“Wait,” JJ cut in, snapping her fingers. “When we invited him to lunch last week and he’d said he had to return a library book…”

The team around you ahh’d as they all chuckled. You looked around, still not getting their amusement, but thankfully Rossi caught on to your uncertainty.

“Reid’s been acting dodgy with us lately, and we’ve all been trying to pinpoint it. I can honestly tell you it’s a relief to know he’s in a relationship, not the mob.”

“You’re the only one that thought that,” Emily started, and from behind her, Aaron cleared his throat.

“No he wasn’t.”

The others turned to give him incredulous looks as JJ asked him, “you actually thought Spencer Reid was in the mob?”

“Hey, you and JJ thought he was in a fight club!” Rossi defended, and this time you had to snort.

“A fight club?” you laughed; Emily just offered a shrug as JJ said,

“He had bruises on his – oh.”

Ah, there was the burning in your cheeks again. The others laughed as Derek rubbed his hands together, looking around.

“Guess this means you all owe me your bets.” At the noise of protest around him, he said quickly, “I was the closest! I said he was crushin’ on someone!”

“You guys had money on his caginess?” you asked them with a bemused laugh. JJ, Rossi, and Hotch gave you apologetic smiles as Emily argued,

“That doesn’t count. Garcia wins, she said he had a secret girlfriend.”

“That’s not even fair,” Derek grumbled, shaking his head and crossing his arms irritably. “How is it the only one of us that was right is the one who isn’t even a profiler?”

Before they could go any further a voice called out, “I’m looking for Spencer Reid’s emergency contact, Miss (Y/L/N)?”

Instantly you scrambled out of your seat, rushing past the others to the Doctor peering down at you.

“Yes, that’s me. Is Spencer okay?”

“Yes ma’am. I’m happy to report he’s just fine,” he assured, and the group around you all made noises of relief. “He needed a decent amount of stitches but the blood loss was minimal and luckily there won’t be any long term damage. He’s ready for visitors, if you’d like me to take you back.”

Though you wanted to see him you didn’t feel right stepping in front of his team. They were his family and he’d known them all much longer than he’d known you. But when you looked back at them, JJ and Emily ushered you to go first.

“Go warn him that we’ve met, because as soon as we see him, he ain’t livin’ this down,” Derek assured you, giving a playful grin. With a laugh, you just gave a nod and followed the Doctor back into the patient rooms.

Spencer looked up at the sound of your heels, a huge smile spreading over his face. Though you instantly smiled back, you made a noise of distress seeing his bandaged arm. Rushing to his side, you gingerly took his arm and held it up, running your fingers lightly over the wrappings.

“Baby, are you okay?” you asked softly, looking up at him in concern. Spencer smiled and reached out, cupping your face with his free hand and brushing his thumb over your cheek in comfort.

“I’m just fine. I’m so sorry, I wanted to call and let you know what’d happened, but I left my phone in the SUV. I know the call from the hospital had to have taken you by surprise.”

“You know…” you started, giving him a smile as you leaned into his touch. “Not as much as finding your team in the waiting room did.”

He actually gasped, his mouth dropping into a shocked ‘O’ as he stared at you in mild horror. “Oh no. I – I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t even think about that. I didn’t mean to throw you to them like that –“

“Spencer it’s okay,” you laughed. “It wasn’t what we’d talked about but I liked meeting them. Although apparently they were making bets about why you kept ducking out of things with them.”

He frowned, an adorable pout coming over his face. “They do that a lot. And they give [me] a hard time for being from Vegas…”

With a laugh, you finally let go of his arm and reached up, cupping his face with both your hands and pulling him down into a kiss. He hummed against your lips, the hand on your cheek sliding into your hair to hold you to him. Your lips moved against one another softly, tongues brushing briefly before you broke apart to keep from going farther.

“I’m really glad you’re okay,” you said softly, letting your fingers slide over his face to sweep his hair back behind his ears. “Did you catch the guy that did this?”

He nodded, a hint of pride in his soft brown eyes as he gave you a smile. “I did, actually. We managed to stop him before he killed a teen, and even did it without him taking his own life. He cut into me instead of his neck. It was close.”

You knew how bad that must’ve shaken him. Spencer had told you his hardest cases were the ones he had to watch someone take their life, almost more so than the cases with kids. To hear he’d been the hero warmed you to your core, and you knew exactly what would make him even happier.

“It’s funny, I was just telling June about how brave Dr. Reid was, and you go and prove me right.”

As expected, Spencer’s face lit up with a smile at that and he sat up a little taller. “You told her I was brave?”

“I did,” you confirmed. “And it’s been decided that she’s Bilbo, I’m Gandalf, and you’re Thorin.”

“I’m Thorin?” he asked in surprise, and you gave an eager nod. “Why?”

“According to June, you’re smart, nice, and clever. She’s a pretty perceptive first grader.”

Of all the things you loved about Spencer, his genuine humility was one of his best qualities. You knew he didn’t see himself for the incredible man he truly was, and watching the soft blush on his cheeks at June’s compliment warmed your heart even further.

Before you could sweet talk your boyfriend any further, though, you heard commotion in the hallway. The rest of Spencer’s team all piled into the room, with Derek in the lead, a phone to his ear.

“Oh yeah, baby girl. I’ve got him right here. I’ll let him tell you why he kept his girlfriend from us for five months.”

Spencer’s eyes widened as Derek held out the phone; he shook his head and Derek gave a deadpan frown. When Spencer refused again, his friend stepped up and pressed the phone to his face.

“No, Morgan, I don’t – oh, uh, hey Garcia –“

You could hear the squeaking of a very upset woman on the other end and you laughed along with the team as JJ and Emily came up on either side of you.

“So, (Y/N), how does dinner with the team Saturday night sound?” Emily mused, and JJ elaborated,

“We have about six months of embarrassing Reid to make up for, and Rossi makes a mean lasagna. You in?”

“Oh, I’m definitely in,” you laughed, catching Spencer’s eye as he rambled off a desperate apology to the phone in Derek’s hand. He raised his brows to you, silently asking, is this okay?

The smile and wink you gave him assured that yes, this was better than okay. This was as close to perfect as meeting someone’s family would ever get.

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #drabble #thats a lie #this is not a drabble #this is 3.5k words lmao #my bad #Anonymous #female reader #spencer reid x female reader #criminal minds #rea writes #rea replies

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yourmidnightlover · 4 years ago

Text

ssa hotchner: chapter 1 - the blazer

TW: harrassment, talk about a case

WC : 5,920

series masterlist

-----------------------------------

"aaron! hey," you answered the phone after hitting enter on the final file you had to upload to the computer.

"y/n! how are you?" your brother questioned kindly.

"um, i've been better," you started, trying to figure out how to tell him the bad news.

"what happened?" aaron asked as he finished filling out the final file he had before noon. "is it about that promotion?" he rolled his eyes, recalling the events of last time you were up for a promotion.

"yea... it is," you sorrowfully revealed. "i uh... i didn't get it. again," you sighed out as you closed your laptop and put it in your bag. "can you... what are you doing for lunch?"

"well the team and i were gonna go out to a local thai place right around the corner from the bau, you could join if you'd like," he replied, wanting to be there for his sister any chance he could. "you know how much they love you."

"i just don't really think my mood is relative to that of a person who's going out with a crowd of people, y'know?" you placed the device in your bag and closed it, pulling it over your shoulder after grabbing your keys from the bag. "besides, i haven't met all of your team yet. dr. reid wasn't there the last time i saw you at my birthday because he was visiting his mother, remember?" you brought up, hoping he wouldn't feel too bad for you.

"y/n, just come to lunch with us. the last case went well, and everyone's pretty excited about that. maybe that'll help put you in a better mood?" aaron suggested as he gathered his things to go out for lunch. "and reid will actually be there this time so you'll be able to meet him," arron smiled at the thought of you meeting the young genius.

"are you sure? i really don't want to impose on your post-case celebrations, aaron," you rebutted as you walked out of the doors of the office you've been working at for nearly 8 years.

"i'm positive. everyone would love to see you again," emily walked into the office, noticing the smile he was wearing that he only has when he's talking to you.

"is that y/n?" emily questioned with a bright smile as hotch nodded. "tell her i said hi! and that i really miss her! oh wait are you talking her into coming to lunch with us?" her eyes widened at the possibility of seeing you again.

"yea, i'm trying to get her to realize that she won't be imposing on us if she comes," the dark haired man sighed.

"here, give me the phone. you know she can't resist my charm," emily teased, you laughed from hearing the remark over the phone as hotch handed it to her. "y/n hotchner. you are going to go to lunch with us whether you like it or not," emily demanded with a smirk.

"oh, yes. there's that charm i know and love, em," you giggled as you put your keys in the ignition, realization setting in that you should probably just go to lunch with them since you have no other plans and are already in your car. "fine. i'll go. should i meet you there or at the office?"

"just meet us there. we're like five minutes away and with morgan's driving it'll be cut in half," emily scolded.

"okay. i'm on my way now. should be maybe 10 minutes," you announced. "i'll see you guys there," you said before hanging up the phone and beginning to drive.

you had been working at a law firm near the bau for nearly 8 years. in fact, next week would make it officially 8 years. the office was run by a few men, under the US district attorney, who you've come to find out are misogynistic pricks who don't like putting women in positions of authority.

you got hired on about 5 months out of law school, columbia law school to be exact. you have an associates in business and a masters criminology, law, psychology. your original dream was to work at the bau with your big brother, clearly, but those dreams changed since you graduated from columbia.

you pulled into the parking lot of 'thailand eatery,' a bau team favorite, and noticed aaron's car parked in the far corner. you smiled to yourself as you found a spot beside him and got out to make your way inside.

"hi, i'm here with aaron hotchner for lunch," you sweetly announced to the hostess before she nodded.

"right this way, ma'am," you followed her to the table full of fbi agents, noticing their laughter that erupted for some unknown reason.

one seat was open next to aaron and emily. you placed your blazer on your seat and a hand on both of their shoulders to announce your arrival. they looked at you in surprise before realizing who you were, big smiles crossing their faces.

"y/n!" arron excitedly announced before standing to give you a nice bear hug. "it's so good to see you," he whispered in your ear kindly.

"i know. it's been a while since we've been able to do this," you grinned widely as you wrapped your arms around his torso.

"okay, okay..." emily interrupted. "this is sweet and all, but i haven't been able to see you since your birthday last year," she announced before you traded your brother's arms for hers.

"it's good to see you, em" you laughed as she squeezed you tightly.

"where the hell have you been! i've missed you," she pouted as you both unwrapped your arms from each other.

"y'know, working for the usual pricks i do... and that's pretty much it," you shrugged as you made your way around the table to hug penelope.

"what have they been doing to you this time, my little sugar plum?" penelope asked sweetly as you gave her another hug.

"the usual, pen. just the usual," you sighed into her ear as you began to hug derek. "but let's not get into that know, yea? i heard you guys had a successful case the other day! that's exciting!" you announced as derek wrapped his arms around you, picking you up and swinging you around a bit.

if you're honest, derek is like a second big brother to you. he was there for you when your brother got stabbed in his own home and was in a coma. he comforted you in your home when you were sobbing on the floor because it wasn't safe for you to visit your own flesh and blood.

"hell yea it was," derek smiled into your ear before placing you down and giving you a chaste peck on the cheek. "but if i need to kick some ass at that work place of yours i won't even hesitate," he whispered into your ear as he rose from your cheek.

"now, now, derek," you tapped his chest playfully. "i don't need you kicking my bosses down like you would a door, as exhilarating as that sounds," you chuckled aimlessly.

"bella, care to indulge me in what they're doing at that office of yours?" rossi said as you made your way to hug him.

"it's not that big of a deal, dave. i'm sure i'm just overreacting again," you sighed as you released him from his hug.

"not a big deal?" aaron butted in. "y/n, you deserved that promotion and they looked you over, yet again," he sassed. "i don't think that's overreacting," he rolled his eyes.

"i know i deserved it, but..." you sighed, weighing all the possibilities. "actually there's no buts. i've worked there for 8 years and have gotten two promotions. i guess i'm just really disappointed," you reasoned, trying not to start crying from the anger bubbling up inside of you.

"two promotions in eight years?" rossi questioned, noticing the annoyed look on your face at the thought. "do those assclowns not realize what an amazing worker you are?" david asked in disbelief.

"i don't know... i guess?" you questioned. "i just don't want to think about that right now," you said as you hugged jj in return.

"are you kidding? we've been to a few of your cases," the blond added. "you're amazing, y/n." jj complimented. "rossi's right. they must be absolutely blind if they don't see what a great worker you are."

"thank you, jayge," you smiled at her before realizing there was one more person at the table.

you'd seen him in pictures, and had heard enough about him to remember a few key points. he's a genius with three phd's, three ba's, he has a thing with germs, he's a bit awkward, and absolutely handsome. the pictures you've seen didn't do him justice.

"i'm assuming you're the famous dr. spencer reid?" you asked, not bothering to reach for a hug or handshake.

"i uhm, yes i am. dr. sp-spencer reid. or you can call me spen-spencer," he cleared his throught. "or reid, or basically whatever you'd uh- whatever you'd prefer," he stuttered out, sitting awkwardly in his chair and barely maintaining eye contact.

"how about we just go with spencer?" you asked as you made your way to your seat beside your brother. "my name's-"

"y/n hotchner, yes," he smiled at you as your brother pushed your chair in for you, you muttering a small 'thank you' in return. "i've uhm... i've heard a lot about you," he stammered.

"oh dear, let me go ahead and apologize in that case," you joked, eliciting laughter from your friends at the table.

"actually, there's uhm - there's no need to apologize. everything i heard was," he sniffled, "really good. it was all good," his lips formed into a line as he nodded at his own words.

"well then i guess i have to mention how great everyone's made you out to be. i mean, a three phds and three ba's at only, what? 34? that's beyond incredible, spencer," you complimented the gorgeous man sitting beside your brother.

"oh uhm, th-thank you, y/n," he blushed. cute.

"it's no problem at all. i mean it's not everyday that you meet a genius that's as young and handsome as you are," you laughed, taking a sip of the water that your brother had ordered for you before you arrived, not even realizing the compliment you had payed to his looks. shit. now you realized. you cleared your thought before acting like you didn't even say anything.

"oh! uhm, th-thank you, again. you're uhm - you're very - you too. not that you're handsome, but that you're very..." he trailed off, biting his lower lip to refrain from humiliating himself even more.

"well then, pretty boy, you sure do have a way with words," morgan teased, eliciting a jab in the stomach from penelope.

"derek morgan, if you do not shut up," penelope scowled.

meanwhile, you turned your head to notice your brother staring oddly at 'pretty boy' who was looking sheepishly at you. you nudged your brother's arm playfully, capturing his attention.

"stare any harder at him and he might explode, aaron," you whispered in his ear, being sure not to look at spencer.

"maybe that needs to happen with the way he's looking at you, y/n," he rebutted.

it's true. if anyone else had been looking at you that way, arron probably would've mentioned that he's in the fbi and that he has more than two guns to scare them away. since it was spencer, everything was different.

"shush, it's just a little crush. what's the worst that could happen?" you rolled your eyes at his protectiveness. "he'll be over it by the end of lunch," you announced, not noticing the way aaron rolled his eyes at your assumption.

aaron had seen spencer around girls enough to know that when he got flustered around them it usually meant something more than just a little crush in spencer's mind. that also means that arron knows that spencer would never try to do anything with you because you're his sister.

"fine," he relished, not wanting to bother with the genius's sure infatuation with you when this is the first time he's gotten to see his own sister in a while. "so you wanted to talk to me about something?" he changed the subject.

"right," you twiddled with your thumbs and looked down into your lap. "ikindaputinmytwoweeksnoticeatthefirmoceifoundoutaboutthepromotion," you rambled out, casually taking a sip of your drink as if you didn't just say you quit your job of 8 years.

"you did what?" he asked in confusion, not understanding what you said.

"i put in my two weeks notice once i found out about the promotion," you slowed down so he could understand, his eyes going wide upon the understanding.

"that's... what you wanted to do, right?" he questioned, not wanting to give you the wrong reaction.

"yea, i think so," you started. "i was just so tired of getting looked over just because of my gender, y'know? i've had to prove myself in everything i've ever done. i think i've more than proved myself at the firm," you announced, still trying to find your own confidence.

:you have, y/n. you've more than proved yourself to be an amazing lawyer," he agreed. "sometimes i'm convinced you might work harder than we do," he scoffed.

"there's no way, a," you laughed at the ridiculous statement. "i've just put my all into the firm. all my time, attention, and hard work has gone into that place. the reason that place is where it is right now is because of me," you pouted.

"i remember. i brought the whole team to the case that put the firm on the map. even reid was there," he stated.

"spencer was at that case?" you asked, not remembering him saying hi afterwords.

"yea, he was. he just got pulled away because of troubles with his mom," you 'ohh'ed at the revelation. "but that case was the hardest one i've ever seen a lawyer handle, y/n."

"thank you," you smiled at the compliment.

"no, i mean it," he relished. "i don't even think i would've won that case. that's what brought everyone to the firm. it was a high profile case, one that the bau was on. of course there was going to be a big turnout. you handled the press, and the pressure amazingly."

it was a case the bau had worked on for nearly a week and a half, and they needed you to further convince the jury that who they caught was the right unsub because of the amount of circumstantial evidence. you were able to get the unsub flustered, and admit to his own crime on the stand with the press in the room.

it was possibly the best case you'd ever gotten because the amount of publicity you'd gotten. but with publicity there came quite a few complications that you hadn't told anyone about.

"that's just the big brother in you talking," you giggled, trying to brush the compliment off naturally.

"whatever you say, y/n. whatever you say," he brought his drink up to his mouth to take a sip.

"so, how was the last case you were on?" you asked, quite intrigued by all the cases he would tell you when he had the chance.

"well, how about we start from the beginning since you like hearing about them so much?" he asked with a grin, you nodded eagerly.

"so it started with the unsub taking abducting his victims..."

throughout the case, you found yourself starting to profiling the suspects yourself, something your brother noticed too. i mean, how could you not do that? you had a degree in psychology and criminology so it made since that profiling them would be natural for you.

everyone at the table interrupted at their parts in the story. when david and jj went to the m.e., when aaron, emily, and derek went to the crime scene, spencer and the geo profile. you were fascinated by their work and everything they were able to do.

when you were younger and your brother had first started at the bau, he really enjoyed calling you to tell you about them. he loved your reactions and how enthusiastic you would become when he was talking. that's really when you first started dreaming about being in the bau, with aaron.

"ugh, y'know i used to dream of going on cases with you guys," you admitted after they finished wrapping up the case in words, taking a sip of your drink to wash your food down.

"really?" spencer asked, not stammering while talking to you for the first time all afternoon.

"yea. aaron would always tell me about the cases when you got back, and i could practically just imagine myself working them with him and you guys," you relished, a smile on your face as you recalled the memories of your younger self.

"i think you'd do excellent on the team," spencer suggested. "it's clear that you already work well with everyone, plus you're more than qualified to work with us, other than the fact that you'd need to go through the fbi training."

"actually i've already been through it," you nonchalantly admitted with a shrug.

"you have?" he questioned as his eyebrows raised in shock. "why haven't you decided to work at the fbi then?" you shrugged at his question.

"i guess i just thought i wouldn't fit in enough?" you said, clearly realizing the contradiction to your earlier statement about imagining yourself on the team. "besides, i got a job at the firm as soon as i got out of the academy, so it all worked out fine."

"actually, reid, that's a good idea," aaron said as he turned his attention to you. "would you be interested in working at the bau with us?" he asked with a small grin, the thought of working with his sister already bringing a smile to his face.

"wh-don't-wouldn't you have to ask your boss about that? that's a big change, adding a new member to a team. you guys already work so well together..." you trailed off, trying to come up with an excuse.

"strauss?" derek asked in feigned disbelief. "she loves you, kid. which is kind of odd since it seems as though she doesn't like hotch as much," derek chuckled.

"oh my god! imagine it, y/n!" penny yelled in excitement. "you could see us everyday, and you wouldn't have to deal with those buttmunches you work for!" she announced.

"used to work for, two weeks from now," you laughed. "and it sounds amazing, but aaron already works there. i'm sure that's enough hotchner's for you guys," you shrugged with a smile.

"that's nonsense!" emily disagreed. "two of my favorite people working with me?! an absolute dream, i tell you," she grinned.

"i guess if you talk to erin about it and she's alright with it..." you trailed off with a huff. "how could i say no?" you smiled.

"oh my gosh this is so exciting!" penny announced, jumping up and rushing arounf the table to hug you. "i'm so ready to work with you!"

"let's not get too beyond ourselves, pen," you giggled. "she hasn't approved my addition yet."

"come on, she's gonna approve it, y/n," dave commented.

"whatever you guys say," you laughed.

you all finished eating, and received the check for lunch of which david insisted on paying. you went up to him afterwards and insisted on paying your part of the bill, but he said it was 'his treat for this wondrous occasion.'

you reluctantly made your way back to your office, the lingering stares from your bosses not going unnoticed. you couldn't wait for those two weeks to be over and for you to be able to leave that hell hole behind, whether you got the job at the bau or not.

you sat down in your chair and reached for your blazer only to realize you must've left it back at the restaurant. great. there goes that 50 bucks.

"hey, sweetcheeks," ron, one of your bosses, commented upon his entrance to your office.

"how many times do i have to tell you not to call me that?" you rolled your eyes, finishing up on the transcript you would need for the case you had tomorrow.

"oh, come on. you know you love it," he said, walking further into your office and sitting on the corner of your desk, ignoring the two chairs that remained across from you. you closed your computer and looked into his eyes, shooting daggers at him with your own.

"what do you want?" you spat at him, wanting to get him out of your hair as soon as possible.

"well, you won't be an employee in two weeks," he announced as if you hadn't already known.

"i'm well aware," you sassed back, trying not to slap him across the face at the fact that he was no longer looking at your eyes, rather further south from them. you snapped your fingers to bring his attention back to your face. "what. do. you. want?"

"well, honey pie, i was just wanting to take you out. y'know, after you're done here," he bit his lip, trying to be seductive but massively failing.

the terrible thing about this fool is, he doesn't know what the word 'no' means. he's always made passes at you, and commented on your appearance. it, of course, made you uncomfortable, but you couldn't really do anything about it. the hopes of getting a promotion was greater than your uncomfortability.

"i've seen the way you look at me, it's no secret," he said, getting off your desk and walking closer to you.

"you mean it's no secret that i find you absolutely repulsive?" you snapped. "shocker," you widened your eyes to feign surprise with your remark.

"are you serious?" he said, his 'seductive' smile now turning into a frown.

"are you serious?" you asked in disgust.

you placed your laptop in your bag, taking your keys out of the bag in the process and beginning to walk out of your office to avoid the man standing there. he grabbed your arm, forcing you to face him.

"don't walk away from me," he gritted, his face red with anger. his grip on your arm tightened, surely leaving a bruise in its wake.

"then don't fucking touch me," you said, attempting to yank your arm away from him, only failing to do so. "let go," you demanded.

"sorry, sweetcheeks, i didn't get that," he smirked. that fucker smirked at your struggle.

knock. knock. knock.

you turned to see whoever was at your door. it was none other than dr. spencer reid. holding your blazer in his hand. you furrowed your brows in confusion before ron decided to drop your arm.

"what the hell is going on?" spencer asked, his eyes not leaving ron's defensive stature as he placed the jacket on one of the chairs by your desk.

"nothing, right doll?" ron looked at you, a disgusting grin on his face.

"yea, right," you rolled your eyes.

spencer's eyes trailed back to you and your arm ron was once holding, right where the red mark is. you swore that if looks could kill, ron would've died the second spencer knocked on your door.

"then what's that on her arm?" he questioned, moving closer to you and pushing you behind him defensively. "you hurt her," he accused. you stepped to his side, noting the way he tried to take charge for you.

"spencer," you placed a hand on his arm, forgetting his thing about germs for a second in attempt to calm him down. "i can handle this," he turned to face you. "i've dealt with this asshole for nearly 8 years, isn't that right, ron?" you questioned with a sneaky grin.

"who the hell is this guy, sweetcheeks?" he questioned as if you had an obligation to tell him who he was.

"you don't get to know that. and you don't get to call me that, either," you reminded him, having to bite your lip to try not to explode on the guy.

"are you fucking this guy?" he accused you. you pushed spencer out of the way, and squinted your eyes at him in disbelief.

"you're seriously asking me that?" you asked. "if i was, it's still none of your fucking business, asshole!" you said getting closer to his face in order to make a point.

slap!

the asshole slapped you.

spencer quickly grabbed you and moved you out of the way before pushing the guy into the wall, knocking your fake plant over as well as a few books on the shelf on the wall. ron's face was smashed into the wall, one of his arms twisted behind his back as both were in spencer's grasp.

"don't you dare touch her. ever again," he demanded, twisting his arm even further, ron squirming to get out of his grip. "did you hear me?"

your hand cupped the side of your face, the sting from ron's wedding band hurting more than you would've thought.

"ahh! yes! yes, i heard you!" he squealed.

"good. now you can apologize to her like a gentleman," he ordered, pushing his arm further up into his back to elicit another groan from the man, you had a hard time keeping a straight face from the scene in front of you.

"shit! ouch! okay! i'm sorry! i'm sorry!" he apologized in a high pitched tone, still trying to get out of spencer's grasp.

"good job," he released him from his grip, a sigh coming from ron at the freedom his arm received. "now go before i change my mind and cuff you right here," he ordered.

"cuff me?" he asked in disbelief. spencer pulled his fbi badge out, flashing it in ron's face, noticing the way his eyebrows shot up. "oh shit."

you moved your hand away from your face, looking at your hand and noticing the patch of blood that remained there. you wiped your cheek, trying to stop the blood flow.

"what did i just say?" spencer asked. "leave. now."

"right," ron said, walking back over towards the door, whispering to you on the way out. "don't bother coming to work tomorrow. or ever again."

"oh that'll be no problem, boss," you scoffed as he made his way out of the door, leaving you and spencer alone in your office.

"i'm uh, sorry about your plant," he pointed at the fake succulent that lay on the floor.

"it was fake anyway," you shrugged as you kneeled down to pick it up as spencer began picking the books up. "thank you, by the way," you smiled at the man.

"it's nothing, really," it was his turn to shrug. "hotch wouldn't have let me on the next case if i didn't intervene in whatever was going on."

oh. so that's why he helped you. of course it was. you were his superior's little sister, nothing else.

"so, what brings you here?" you asked as he offered you his hand to help you stand up, you gladly took it and rose to your feet. "oh sorry, you have a germ... my bad" you grimaced at the thought of making him uncomfortable.

"oh, don't worry about it. and i was actually here to bring you your blazer," he said, retrieving the jacket from the chair and giving it back to you. "i uhm, you forgot it at the restaurant."

"right, i noticed that once i got here. thank you," you thanked him, placing the jacket over your arm and picking up your bag. "you've already saved me twice today and we've only just met," you laughed.

"it seems that way," he smiled, walking with you out of the office. he gently grabbed your shoulder and turned you to face him once you were outside. "your face is bleeding, y/n."

"oh," you reached your hand up to notice the way the blood was still lightly flowing. "oops," you laughed.

"you should clean it up, you don't need to get that infected," he suggested, his hand tracing the outskirts of ron's handprint on your face.

"thanks for the recommendation, doc," you laughed. "i think i have some stuff back at my place that i could use."

"i'm so sorry that happened," he frowned slightly, his hand dropping to his side.

"ehh," you shrugged. "i'm sure you've seen worse. besides, i can handle myself," you said as he began walking with you in the direction of your car.

"let me see your arm?" he asked softly.

you brought it up closer to his eyesight. he gently grasped your arm, nothing like the way he had done to ron earlier in your office. his touch left goosebumps on your skin, the soft way his fingers traced your arm.

"it's already bruising, so i think it's only a subcutaneous bruise, luckily," he diagnosed.

"i'll bet you could pass as a medical doctor if you tried," you noted, nudging his arm gently with yours.

"many people make that mistake already! it's a frequent misconception by a lot of people i meet," he smiled.

"if i hadn't already known what kind of doctor you were, i'm sure i might've fallen into that misconception," you added with a grin as you approached your car. "so, this is me," you smiled and nodded at the tall man.

"oh! right! uhm..." he trailed off. "it was nice to meet you, y/n," he smiled kindly.

his smile's nice. warm. very home-like.

"it was nice to meet you too," you smiled. "thank you, again. for saving me back there."

"of course. anytime. i'm just glad i got there before anything got too bad..." he furrowed his brows at the not so distant memory.

"yea, you and me both, handsome," you joked, noticing the way his cheeks blushed at the compliment. "so where are you parked? the least i could do is give you a ride to your car," you suggested.

"oh, i was actually on my way to the metro. driving isn't really my thing..." he grimaced.

"then how about i drive you home?" you asked, wanting to figure out how to thank the perfect man that stood before you.

"i-i don't want you to be going out of your way..." he shook his head.

"look, spencer, i won't force you to do anything, but i want to do this," you placed a hand on his forearm. "at least as a thank you."

"um..." he looked at his watch, noticing the time. "okay, i guess that'd be nice. besides, i've missed the last ride to where i need to go," he shrugged with a small grin.

"great! just tell me where to, doc," you said as you both got into your car.

"capital plaza apartments," he announced with a grin.

"sounds great," you said as you turned the key in the ignition, backing out of your parking spot and starting the way towards his apartment. "so, you've worked at the bau for 12 years? right?"

"yea. i started when i was 22," he announced.

"right, i remember aaron telling me how you were the youngest member of the team when you got there," you encouraged him to continue.

"right again. they actually had to make an exception to let me into the field," he laughed softly. "they had to waiver basically every physical exam on account of my mental capabilities."

"i mean, whatever works. it's so intriguing that at such a young age you know so much, and your knowledge is only expanding," you shook your head in disbelief.

"well you've accomplished quite a lot and you're only 30. working at a firm for 8 years and being as successful as you are is remarkable," he remarked.

"thank you, spencer," you looked over at the man and smiled before stopping at the red light.

"do you have any tissues?" he asked, you furrowed your brows in question. "your cheek is still bleeding," he informed you.

"oh! there right there in the glovebox," you pointed across his lap as he grabbed the tissue from the compartment and reached across the console himself.

you leaned in across the console yourself, trying to make it easier for him to wipe it off. he cautiously used it to dab the little blood remaining on your cheek off, his hand lingering for a while.

you looked up to meet his eyes, the red from the stoplight illuminating his facial structure in a way that was otherworldly. you were entranced by each others' gaze, not even noticing the light turned green until the car behind you honked their horn, alerting you to step on the gas.

"oh! sorry," you apologized, biting the inside of your lip as you continued to drive him back to his apartment.

"don't be," he swallowed the lump in his throat.

sooner than later, you pulled into his apartment complex to drop him off.

"thank you so much, again, spencer," you placed a hand on his upper arm to emphasize your thanks.

"you don't need to thank me, y/n. i was happy to help," he placed one of his much larger hands on top of yours, squeezing it gently before he made his way out of your car. "goodbye."

"goodbye, spencer," you returned as you watched him walk up to his apartment building, practically gawking at the man that saved you.

you drove back to your house quickly, entering the code for the gate. you noticed yet another piece of paper taped to the front of the gate. you ripped it off the metal, and placed it inside your bag.

upon entering you placed your bag on the hook that remained on your wall after retrieving the sheet of paper from it. you kicked your shoes off beside the door neatly, walking into your kitchen to pour yourself a small glass of wine before tending to your wound.

you walked into your bathroom and gazed at the handprint on your face, noticing the small gash that remained on your cheekbone. after washing your face, you used an antibiotic on the cut, placing a small bandage overtop.

walking into your bedroom, you admired the view from the large window as you changed into your pajamas. you were too tired to eat anything, but you knew you needed to get something into your system.

you walked back into your kitchen and found a granola bar you could eat quickly. you grabbed the sheet of paper and walked back into your living room as you continued to eat.

underneath your sofas, there are storage bins that you keep extra things inside. what also happens to be inside of that bin is a small, old shoebox. inside of that shoebox you placed the note, along with all the others you've received, not bothering to read it this time.

you made your way back into the bathroom, brushed your teeth, and returned to your bedroom.

it was a long day, very eventful. you could only hope the letters would stop if you got the job at the bau. but for now... sleep.

#ssa hotchner #y/n #spencer x reader #spencer x you #spencer reid #spencer #y/n hotchner #series #criminal minds

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collecting-stories · 4 years ago

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Heartbeat - Rafe Cameron

Request: Hey, I was hoping if you could do reader x Rafe inspired by Heartbeat by Childish Gambino? Also I freaking love your writing!!

A/N: I’m not really a Childish Gambino fan so this was me grasping at straws to write this honestly. Pretty much angst.

Outer Banks Masterlist

_ ⭐︎*.・✶ ☾ ◦*.⭐︎_

Post graduation you saw less of the actual island than you would’ve liked. You came around for all the expected holidays and birthdays but otherwise you stayed in Chapel Hill. It was easier that way, you could avoid all the people on the island that you didn’t want to see, make-believe that your heart was totally in this relationship but you knew you weren’t. 

You’d gotten engaged four months ago and, inviting everyone she could think of, your mom sent an invitation to the Camerons. One that Rafe intercepted. Old high school flames never die out or whatever cheesy line your mom was keen on saying when you lost your literal train of thought at the sight of him. 

“Liam’s not a bad guy,” she tried to reassure you, “I just think it’s such a shame you and Rafe broke things off. I always thought you two would end up together.” 

You almost did. 

You ended up in his bed the morning after your party. Not what your mother had in mind but it had happened all the same. And you tried so hard to regret it, he’d told you enough times that he ‘didn’t do commitment’ that you didn’t need to hear it from him again, or throw away an entire relationship because of a stupid mistake like hooking up with your ex after too much wine.

But it wasn’t just too much wine and Rafe wasn’t just an ex. He was that ex. The one you would throw everything away for if he told you he wanted more than just sex. He was the reason you stayed away from the island, because you knew once you opened that door you would never be able to close it again.

The first time he texted you was after the night you spent together. Something dumb that you shouldn’t have even wanted to respond to, especially when you were sitting at the island club having brunch with your mom, dad, and Liam. But the text came through and you quickly replied. A series of less that appropriate banter followed until he one upped your response.

-you look so sexy right now-

Not the greatest love poem on earth but there was always something about Rafe. Something that had you in the bathroom stall with him while your fiancé was sitting out on the deck with your parents.

“I can’t keep doing this.” You insisted, fixing your dress as you stood in the stall with him, still a little high from the moment even as the gravity of it settled around you.

“So don’t.” Rafe shrugged.

As much as you wanted to scream you couldn’t even be surprised by his comment. It was exactly what you’d come to expect out of him. You wanted so desperately for him to tell you to throw all this away. You didn’t need a wedding, you just needed Rafe. But he didn’t need you and he made that abundantly clear.

He stayed away for a week and then it was like he had never left.

“You look amazing.”

Your eyes shut and you bit down on your lip. If you opened your eyes you would’ve seen Rafe in the reflection of the mirror, standing behind you with the door closed. The attendant had left you in the dressing room alone to think over the white strapless gown you had on. A dream dress, really, but you weren’t entirely sure it was your dream or your dress.

“Rafe, what are you doing here?” You asked, crossing your arms, careful of the fabric, as you turned to face him.

“Heard you were trying on dresses, wanted to offer my opinion.” He shrugged.

“I don’t need your opinion...the dress isn’t for you.”

He frowned, walking over to you and turning you around again so that you could face the mirror. You looked away from him, trying not to meet his eyes in the mirror as he laid his hands on your hips and tilted his head to kiss your neck and shoulder.

“That’s okay, I care more about what’s underneath the dress.” He said, lips brushing against your skin as he spoke. You felt your eyes begin to flutter closed before you yanked yourself out of his grasp, pushing him away.

“God, Rafe, get off of me!” You snapped. “I already told you, I’m not doing this anymore! I’m getting married-”

“So you keep telling me.”

“I’m fucking standing here in my dress for god’s sake! I don’t want to keep having this conversation over and over again. I told you at the club that it’s over Rafe...I’m done doing this with-”

“Leave him.”

“What?” You stopped talking, eyes wide as you looked at Rafe in surprise, mind trying to grasp his offer. It was generous to call it that, as an offer usually contained an actual offer.

“Leave him. Move back to the island. Stay with me.” He requested.

You felt like hours passed as you stood there in the small dressing room with him, trying to read anything from his expression. Finally you shut your eyes, covering your hands with your face as you tried not to cry in front of Rafe, “you son of a bitch. You know how hard it is for me to walk away.”

“So don’t.”

“Why? So you can pick and choose when you want me around? No. Rafe, get out. I’m getting married.”

“Okay,” he nodded, smirking as he looked you over again. You crossed your arms and glared at him as he moved toward you again. He pulled your arms away from your body, putting them up on your shoulders as he wrapped his arms around your waist.

“Rafe-”

He hummed, lips brushing against your throat as you tilted your head back. “You’re so beautiful, you know that?”

“It won’t work Rafe,” you insisted, even as your shoulders relaxed.

“I’m just stating a fact,” he replied, continuing to kiss along your shoulders and neck. “I bet your douche fiancé doesn’t even know what to do with you.” His hands grazed your sides as you gave in, kissing him.

You knew it was a bad idea. Not just because you were in a public dressing room while your mother and future mother-in-law in the waiting room, ready to judge every dress but because you were engaged, and supposed to be happy, with an entirely different man. You needed to let go of the past and the island and Rafe but every time you tried you couldn’t bring yourself to walk away. Not now that you had been given a taste of him.

A knock on the dressing room door had you pulling away from Rafe, wiping at your mouth as you stepped around him to answer the door. “Yeah?”

“Are you still trying things on honey? Do you need help?” Your mother’s voice carried through the small space.

“No, I’m okay. I’ll be out in a minute.” You promised.

You listened to her walk away, heels clicking, as you let out a breath and turned to face Rafe, “you need to go.”

“You sure?”

“Just...go.” You insisted, sitting down on the short bench that sat against the wall, just inside the door.

Rafe nodded, walking over to the door and grabbing the handle before he looked down at you. “I meant what I said before.” He said.

“You never mean anything you say.”

taglist: @maplelattes22 @poguesrforlife @freckled-and-daydreaming @chasefreakinstokes @millie-753 @fangirlwithme @alex12948 @katherine097 @tangledinsparkles @carbonated-beverage @mariofgreengables @damonsalvawhore27 @dopedoodes @dolanfivsosxox @belledutchess @poguelifeeee @faded-blue @parkerpetertingle @thebookwormlife @summer-clouds-and-long-days @jellyfishbeansontoast @minigranger @hoewkeye @love-someone-special @tiredfeels @strangerthanfanfiction713 @the-only-nana @tomzfrog @mozz-are-lla @vindictive-hearts @poguestyleskye @ssprayberrythings @jenahbell @beautyandthebleh @gothackedalready @teenwaywardasgardian @sarahcxmeron @haha-fuck-you-thot @stillbelieve398-5 @rewindlr @queenniccimicci @kissessforharryyy @thedarkqueenofavalon @alytavzla @bqmblebee @linniep @nerdypartytrashpsychic @xxchxrryxx @spencer-reid-is-a-cutie @danielladreaming @obx-saltlife @youngestxhearts @spnobsessedmemes @wowitswondergurl @celestialmaybank @mybnkjj @pineappleandcherries @mysterious-adventurer @justawilddreamerchild @rhyetaylor62 @calm-rejects @balletandyuzu @oh-annaa @aiifandomsunite @x-lulu @ceruleanjj @wicked-laugh @obxwriterfan @allie-mcginn @pcterparxer @literarycharleton @khiaraaa-in-spacee @crushe-s @teamnick @daydreamlilys @collectiveuniverses @activist-af @mdgrdians @buckys-sunflower @vindictive-hearts @copper-boom @talksoprettyjjx @5am-cigarette @smiithys @dontjinx-it @outerbanksbro @mysticsthinking @heavenlymama @rudy-pankow-needs-an-oscar @babymatilda @raekenliar @lemur46 @haute-shawn @calums-betch

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spencers-renaissance · 3 years ago

Text

Rain is a Chance to be Touched Ch.10

I'm never not thinking of you

Chapter Nine

This is the tenth chapter in my ongoing hotchreid fic! Please click here for the fic summary, full tags, trigger warnings, more information etc.

Last Chapter: Penelope revealed her feelings for Emily, a shit ton of fluff occurred, and Aaron and Spencer went on their first date!

In This Chapter: Aaron and Jack help Spencer with a bad day, Aaron goes on a case and talks with Emily, and finally comes home to Spencer.

TW: usual apply; Spencer has a particularly bad day so mentions of depression are higher than usual

Word Count: 3.5k

This chapter is split into two: the smutty end is published on my nsfw blog (link at the end of this post) and should only be read by adults, but this chap reads great without that end too!

RCT Masterlist // Main Masterlist // Read on AO3

AARON

"Just in case you ever foolishly forget; I am never not thinking of you." — Virginia Woolf

The only reason Aaron doesn’t break any traffic laws in his speedy drive over to Spencer’s apartment this early on a Saturday morning is his anxious little boy sitting in his backseat.

He’d told him where they were going as he’d hurriedly buckled him into his carseat, but Jack was smart enough to notice the harried concern rolling off him in waves even if his five-year-old brain couldn’t comprehend it enough to know the right question to ask. Every time he glances at him in the rearview mirror, Jack is staring back at him with his brows furrowed. Aaron knows himself well enough to recognise that his returning smile is far from convincing.

“Everything’s fine, Jack,” he tries as they near Adams Morgan. He thanks the heavens that they don’t live far across the Virginian border. “Spencer just needs us to come and cheer him up.”

“Will Penny be there?” Jack’s eyes are wide and filled with confused worry, and Aaron runs his palm down his face. Navigating situations like these were never his strong suit. He remembers the time Haley’s mom had her stroke: even though she was the one fearing whether the mother that would greet them at the hospital would be the mother she knew and loved, she still spent the whole time consoling Jack, who had easily picked up on the nervous energy that shrouded the two of them.

“No, buddy. Penny’s out with a friend today so it will be up to us to make Spencer all better. We can do that, can’t we?” He tries for another cajoling smile and it’s at least slightly better than the last time.

“Yeah.” Jack nods confidently in answer to the question. He’s probably noticed how Spencer’s frown always turns into a fond smile at Jack’s attention. “I love Spencer.”

“I know you do.” So do I, Aaron thinks as he steps on the accelerator a little harder, desperate to be at his apartment building already. The thought doesn’t scare him as much as he expected it might.

It’s been nearly a fortnight since his first date with Spencer and they’ve been the best couple of weeks he and Jack have had since Haley’s passing, really. He’s spent every day the team has been at home over at Spencer’s or driving across town to bring him back to his own place, and although Penelope had told him that nothing would fundamentally change when they finally made this thing between them official, the material shift in their relationship is hard to miss.

Things haven’t magically gotten better for either of them since they became ‘boyfriends’ as Spencer liked to put it (Aaron smiles everytime Spencer says it, even though it feels far too young for a man in his early 40s like him), but life is definitely… happier. The first thing he does each morning is either wake up to an armful of sleepy Spencer or, if he’s away on a case, ring him as he gets ready for the day.

Somehow they’ve settled into a kind of peaceful rhythm, a simple domesticity far more emblematic of a decades-long marriage. He tries not to compare it to his relationship with Haley, but it’s hard. Granted, dating her in their high school years was dizzying, it was exciting and new and had his heart going crazy. But with Spencer, it’s easy. He feels guilty for thinking it — part of him still can’t let go of this pointless and unhelpful obligation to hold Haley on a pedestal — but if soulmates are real, he knows he’s found his in Spencer Reid.

Of course, it helps that Jack can’t get enough of him; Aaron might actually feel jealous if he wasn’t so over the moon about their growing relationship. A ridiculous smile spreads across his face whenever he catches a glimpse of the two of them together: Jack climbing into Spencer’s lap when he’s still sleepy after a nap or Spencer making him dinosaur shaped sandwiches while they chat about his day at school.

The feeling of family and belonging that had died a slow death in his heart when Haley had walked out on him is slowly regenerating, cells humming and muscles buzzing as everything he thought would never happen for him again happens right before his eyes.

He parks in front of Spencer’s apartment and lifts Jack out of the car, putting him on his hip instead of letting him walk, and for once, Jack doesn’t complain about it. After letting himself in with his key downstairs, he takes the elevator up to the third floor and lets himself in again. Despite the circumstances, his insides warm at the reminder Spencer’s keys on his keyring brings him. Home.

“Sweetheart?” he calls, letting Jack down from his hip as he closes the door behind them. There’s no sofa lump today so Aaron assumes he’s still in bed. It’s not a totally bad sign: it is only 8.30 am, but it takes a lot for Spencer to ask for help. He knows he must have deliberated over sending the message asking him to come over — especially on a Saturday when he knows Aaron will be with Jack — for a long time, meaning he’s likely been awake for hours, tormented by his own mind.

He leads Jack across the dark apartment and opens the door to Spencer’s room quietly. He’s lying on the bed facing the door and his eyes are open as they come in, Aaron immediately lifting Jack onto the bed. Spencer shifts and opens his arms for Jack to cuddle into, eyeing Aaron with a tired smile on his face. He toes his shoes off and climbs onto the bed too, wrapping one arm around both his boys.

“Thank you for coming,” Spencer whispers as the three of them lie there, Jack sandwiched between the two of them.

As sad as Aaron is that they had to drive across the city this morning, being wrapped up in Spencer’s bed, watching his son and his partner cuddle closely for comfort, being surrounded by so much that screams home at him is quite possibly the best start to the weekend he could’ve hoped for.

He leaves it a little longer, reluctant to exit the warm cocoon of blankets that smell like Spencer, but eventually he extracts himself from the cuddle. “I’m going to assume you haven’t eaten, baby,” he says, watching as his movement causes the other two to stretch and rearrange themselves. Spencer nods, smiling as Jack buries his face in his chest, little puffs of breath ruffling Spencer’s t-shirt.

He and Jack ate before Spencer’s text message came through, but he brings a tray of pop tarts and cereal for everyone, knowing that his son absolutely cannot watch somebody else eat without having something for himself. Jack sits up eagerly, but Spencer’s face doesn’t register any interest, so he climbs carefully onto the bed and slots himself in between his son and his partner. As Jack tucks into his second bowl of Reese's Puffs, Aaron turns to Spencer.

“Hey, let’s get some food into you,” he says gently, lifting Spencer up slightly into a sitting position. It always surprises him how easy his boyfriend is to lift, and it always makes his heart sink when it hits him that he’s only this light because he’s been suffering for so long; because he was too self-involved to see it.

“Not hungry.”

“I know. But you know as well as I do — probably better than I do — why you need to eat.” He hands him a small bowl of cereal and a blueberry poptart. “Come on. For me? For Jack?”

Hearing his name, Jack, naturally, chimes in. “The cereal is really good, Spence,” he mumbles through a mouthful of milk and puffs, “and I’m gonna have three whole pop tarts after this.”

“You can have one pop tart after that,” Aaron corrects him, chuckling at his son’s growing appetite.

It’s enough to convince Spencer, though, and he tucks into the cereal. Thankfully, he doesn’t slurp like Jack does, so only one side of him is horrifically noisy as his two boys eat their breakfast. Haley used to hate it when Jack ate his cereal like that; she would leave the room while he was at the kitchen table having his lucky charms, and it never failed to make Aaron laugh.

He’s been noticing recently that memories of Haley don’t carry the same pain they used to. They’re like fleeting thoughts that make him smile without festering in his stomach for the rest of the day, making a rotting home for themselves as they ache and ache and ache. It’s a nice change, reminding him that he’s healing.

Once breakfast is finished, Aaron leaves Spencer and Jack to cuddle quietly on the bed together for a moment, smiling when he hears Jack whispering all the animal facts he can remember as he pulls the door to. He sets about making a cosy fort in the living room, spreading all the blankets and cushions he can find on the rug in front of the TV and queueing up Finding Nemo before inviting the other two in.

Watching Spencer become acclimated to children's movies was one of the simpler pleasures in life. He’d slowly realised that correcting every factual inaccuracy on screen generally meant he never shut up, and after a not-so-subtle move from Jack — reaching up and covering his mouth with his germ-covered five-year-old palm — he’d got the hint.

Aaron thinks he secretly has a soft spot for watching kids’ films now; he’s the one to suggest them half the time. Jack definitely loves him for it.

They spend the rest of the day munching their way through all the snacks Aaron can find in Spencer’s kitchen as they make their way through every age-appropriate movie in the apartment. Spencer cuddles close to Aaron’s side, laying his head on his chest as he lies down, sagging his weight against him. Jack makes himself comfortable in between Aaron’s legs, his head resting just under Spencer’s, and although Aaron’s wildly uncomfortable by the second film, he doesn’t move. He’s never been happier, he thinks, than in this exact moment.

Despite Aaron’s stern mask, his mind is anywhere but the case they’ve just been assigned. He never likes leaving Spencer in the middle of these ‘flares’ as they’ve come to call them, especially when he has to watch his eyes glisten with unshed tears he knows will spill down his cheeks as soon as he leaves the apartment. The gentle kiss he’d pressed to Spencer’s forehead and the tight hug he’d wrapped him up in for a few beats too long aren’t enough to satisfy the soul-deep ache he feels at being away from him.

He tells the team that they'll debrief before they land before making his way to his usual seat and pulling out his phone.

I miss you already.

He can’t help the fond smile that spreads across his face as the very message he’d wanted to send his boyfriend is staring up at him already. Spencer had beaten him to it.

I miss you more. How are you feeling?

He’d left Spencer’s apartment in a hurry this morning, driving Jack over to Jessica’s before racing into the Quantico offices with barely time to spare before everyone else showed up. Even with the hurried goodbye and scarfed down wholemeal toast that had amounted to his morning with Spencer, he’d been able to tell that he was feeling at least a little brighter than the day before. For one, he’d actually got out of bed, and he hadn’t turned down Aaron’s offer of a bowl of cereal either.

Much better, Spencer replies. Still glad I have today off though. I’m not really feeling up to much.

Just take it easy, baby. Work can wait until tomorrow.

He locks his phone once he receives a simple ‘:)’ in response, feeling significantly more at ease knowing Spencer was doing better. As much as he’d still rather be cuddled up in bed with him, he can at least focus on the case with his head in the right place.

His closer study of the casefile doesn’t get very far, though, because before he can read past the first page, Emily’s sliding into the seat opposite him. He takes a deep breath to steady himself before leaning back in his seat and meeting her eyes. This pattern of his team asking after Spencer instead of talking to him directly is getting old fast. Every time it manages to bring him crashing back down to the reality he’s been trying to push away — and that reality is every member of the team letting Spencer down.

She doesn’t start talking right away, instead leveling him with an intense look for a few seconds before leaning forward. “How are you doing, Hotch?”

That’s… not what he expected. He feels himself freeze as his brain pauses for a heartbeat before he recovers, trying to look as unsurprised and unaffected as possible.

“I’m fine,” he asks, narrowing his eyebrows suspiciously. “Why do you ask?”

She heaves a sigh before leaning back against her seat. “I ask because the last time I wondered whether somebody was okay, I didn’t ask, and I’ve spent the past few months beating myself up. I’ve learnt my lesson.”

This conversation is catching him completely off-guard. “I see.” He’s let go of a lot of the anger he’s been harbouring towards his team over the past few weeks. He knows that it’s unproductive and half borne from his own repressed guilt, and his subordinates realising their wrong-doing has allowed him to release himself from the role he’d kept himself in: righteously defending Spencer when no-one else was up to the task.

He knows for a fact that Emily and Spencer have messaged a few times over the past couple of weeks, and he knows that Spencer connected deeply with her apology and felt ready to start rekindling their relationship, so he probably should have expected more from her when she sat down.

“I’ll ask you again, Hotch,” she says quietly. “How are you doing?”

He exhales forcefully through his nose as he considers how to answer that question. “Really, Emily, I’m doing well.” He allows a small smile to creep onto his face as he thinks about all the beauty in his life at the moment. “Jack’s getting on well at school, and I couldn’t be more content with the direction my life is taking.”

“Oh my God,” she whisper-shouts, her eyes widening as she reads between the lines, “you’re dating Spencer.”

Well. At least she kept her voice down. “Yes,” he confirms, smiling again. “I’m dating Spencer.”

She looks utterly stunned for a few seconds as she tries to wrap her head around the admittedly mismatched pairing. “But… I asked how you were doing because you’ve looked actually miserable at times over the past few weeks.”

“Being at work means I’m not with Spencer,” he replies, sort of enjoying managing to surprise Emily Prentiss — everyone on the team can attest that she has a reputation for being unshockable, “that’s a good enough reason to be miserable as far as I’m concerned.”

“Damn,” she mutters, relaxing back into her seat as the news settles in. “I did not expect that.”

“It’s still fairly new, but it’s been a long time coming. Obviously though, Emily, you need to keep this quiet, for multiple reasons.”

“Of course.” A few seconds pass before she smiles excitedly. “I can’t believe you guys are dating! This is so exciting. Please tell me Penelope knows, I need someone to talk to about this.”

He rolls his eyes at that, already anticipating the teasing and gossiping in his future. “Yes,” he sighs. “Penelope knows.”

As nice as talking to Emily about Spencer is, however, it just makes him miss him more.

Thankfully, they manage to solve the case in only a couple of days and they’re flying back to Virginia on Tuesday night. Spencer had told him during their early morning call, when Aaron was pulling his pants on, rummaging around his hotel room to try and find a clean pair of socks, that he was going into work today, so Aaron expects he’ll probably be tired when he gets home.

Just the thought of Spencer’s apartment makes him feel warm inside these days. It’s nothing special, but it’s far homelier than Aaron’s, the floor to ceiling bookcases and deep green walls, the mismatched furniture and haphazard knick knacks giving the place the sort of character Aaron’s longed for over the past year or so.

It reminds him, somewhat sadly, of the house he shared with Haley. She was incredible at so many things, but he always admired the house she kept: clean, bright, and full of everything that made them a family. His boxy, cheap apartment in Arlington filled with Ikea furniture and absent of pictures that would only make his heart ache is nothing in comparison to the character he was used to.

He doesn’t open his case files on the jet home, opting instead to play online scrabble with Spencer. As soon as he got the poke invitation, a wide smile spread across his face as he imagined his boyfriend curled up in the corner of the sofa or in his bed, eager to spend time with Aaron even before he got home, even by means of playing a game neither of them found overly enjoyable. It connects them, and that’s what matters.

Thankfully, none of the team slide into the vacant seat opposite him and demand details of Spencer and their private life, though he can feel the occasional set of eyes on him which he steadfastly ignores. Everyone had, at some point in the case, brought Spencer up, but generally in a far less intrusive way than has typically been their style. JJ had told him earnestly to send him her love, Rossi had patted him on the back when Derek had made a fond remark about a topic Spencer used to love to rant about, and Alex had asked him casually how things were going when they were alone in the hotel bar at one point.

Things are looking up, Aaron can’t deny that. There’s hope for a reconciled team, for rebuilt trust and relationships, for a future in which his blood doesn’t boil every time he thinks about the mass betrayal of his boyfriend.

The fiery ache in his chest whenever he thinks about it relaxes quicker now, leaving completely on good days and easing into a dull simmer when Spencer’s struggling (or when the irrational anger borne from irreparable grief flares up and snipes at every thought, every feeling he has).

Once they’re back in Quantico, Aaron climbs into his SUV, declining the team’s invite to go out for drinks. Just because they’re slowly starting to make things up to Spencer doesn’t mean he’s quite ready to be around them in an inebriated state. Bitterness would creep in, and he’d be unpleasant, he just knows it. All he really wants to do is drive home and crawl into bed with his boy.

Jack will be with Jessica until the morning when she’ll take him to school, so he misses the turning for Arlington and continues driving into the city. There’s no point in going back to his cold, dark apartment when Spencer’s only a little further away. His stomach sparks in excitement as his surroundings fade into the achingly familiar vibrant landscape of the Adams Morgan district. It feels just as much home to him now as Arlington has for so many years.

It’s not lost on him that in just a few months Spencer’s managed to make an area he was previously fairly indifferent about feel as comfortable as somewhere he’s lived for close to fifteen years.

He leaves his car on the street outside Spencer’s apartment building and lets himself in with his key, taking the stairs two at a time in his eagerness to see his partner. The tired, heavy weight he’s been carrying that had only grown over the course of the case, making his head hurt and his shoulders pinch, lessens the closer he gets to Spencer. All thoughts of serial killers and frazzled police officers fade into insignificance when there’s a beautiful man waiting for him just a few feet away.

Before he can knock or let himself in though, the door is pulled open and Spencer’s right in front of him. He’s bundled up in one of Aaron’s hoodies and a pair of pyjama bottoms, thick mis-matched socks on his feet despite the nice temperature in the apartment.

“Sorry,” he says sheepishly when he clocks Aaron’s surprised expression. “I saw you park on the street and it always takes you approximately two minutes and forty-seven minutes to get from the door downstairs to my front door.”

“Ah,” Aaron grins as an eyebrow quirks up, “so this spying thing is a regular occurrence?” Spencer steps aside and he walks into the apartment, dumping his jacket and briefcase on the chair as usual.

“Not really…”

“Just regular enough to time me enough times to get an approximate time for my travels through the building,” he teases, turning around as Spencer closes the front door and walks over to him. A frankly delightful blush has settled over his cheekbones and as much as Aaron doesn’t want him to feel embarrassed, he looks good enough to eat when he’s pinkened up like this.

“Shut up.” Spencer folds himself into Aaron’s arm, pressing his face into his shoulder as they both relax into one another’s touch. “Glad you’re home.”

“Not as glad as I am to be home, baby.”

Smutty end to this chapter

Chapter Eleven

If this chapter brought anything up for you, hotlines are in the endnotes of the AO3 version of this fic. Bigger countries are listed and a link is included if you live somewhere else in the world. I love you <3

taglist: @criminalmindsvibez @suburban–gothic @strippersenseii @takeyourleap-of-faith @makaylajadewrites @iamrenstark @hotchseyebrows @reidology @i-like-buttons @spencerspecifics @bau-gremlin @hotchedyke @tobias-hankel @goobzoop @marsjareau @garcias-bitch @marvel-ous-m @oliverbrnch @sbeno22 @aaron-hotchner187 @kuolonsyoja @reidreids (add yourself to my taglist via this form!)

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ruzek-halstead · 4 years ago

Text

monster

pairing: jay halstead x hailey upton

written based on prompt:

"our kids are bitter rivals and the only time we ever meet is when we’re both called to the principal’s office and whatever maybe i think you’re kind of cute but your kid’s a monster"

warnings: swearing, fluffery

masterlist

au || detective jay || lawyer hailey

today had been a hectic day. hailey had been all over the city; meeting clients, stopping by the courthouse and grabbing paper work from her office. the last thing she needed today was to be called into her daughter’s school because she had gotten into an altercation with another student… again. she’d gotten called in a few times already, due to one of her daughter’s classmates constant teasing and general brattiness. every time she had been called in, the boy’s father was unable to attend due to work commitment. that definitely annoyed her a little bit because here she was running around like a chicken with her head cut off, and she was still finding the time to go into school. apparently he was a detective (and a single father) who regularly did undercover work and often relied on nannies and close friends to watch over his son. by the time she reached the school and rushed into the front office, the secretary was waiting usher her into the principal’s office. upon entering the room, she spotted her daughter, spencer, sitting in one corner of the room and her nemesis (at least that’s how spencer referred to him; his actual name is milo) in the other corner. the only difference this time compared to all the rest of the times she’d been in this office is that milo’s father was present. for a second, she faltered in her step because she was blindsided by how unbelievably attractive he was. he’s dressed in a black t-shirt and jeans, where his badge was pinned (obviously no gun because they were in a school). she was distracted by his green eyes and freckle littered face but was quickly brought back into the room by the dirty look he was shooting at her. if there was anything hailey was an expert at, it was throwing some side-eye so she didn’t hesitate in the slightest in returning it. “ah, ms. upton, thank you for joining us!” principal mathews greeted her and motioned for her to sit down in the chair beside her daughter. hailey sat down and reached over to press a quick kiss on the crown of spencer’s head. “hi baby,” she greeted, throwing her a soft smile. she noted in her quick inspection that her daughter had no obvious injuries, so she wondered what this was about. “ms. upton, this is mr. halstead, milo’s father,” principal mathews introduced. “i’ve called you here today after yet, another altercation.” there was a snort from the opposite side of the room. “spencer, would you like to tell us what happened?" “milo pushed me into the ground!” the principle raised an eyebrow. “and?” “he said boys are better than girls and that i suck!” hailey was stifling a laugh. “then what happened?” “he pulled my hair so i punched him in the nose.” hailey gasped and leaned over to look at milo’s face. sure enough, his nose was bruised, but luckily the blood was cleaned up. “oh my god, spencer! honey, you can’t just go around punching people in the face.” “yeah, but he deserved it,” she replied, pouting. “you didn’t have to punch me!” milo retaliated in response. “i was only joking!” spencer made a move to get up out of her chair (she definitely had hailey’s temper). “liar! you’re only saying that now because i punched you and you cried like a little girl!” “oh jesus,” hailey muttered, turning her attention to principle mathews. “i am so sorry. i’ll have a talk with spencer about using her words instead of hands.” for the first time since she arrived, mr. halstead (she’d heard his first name was jay, but it felt so informal since she’d never properly met him) spoke. “that’s probably a conversation you should have had already. then my kid wouldn’t be sitting here with a bloody nose.” hailey raised her eyebrows in surprise. “excuse me?” jay turned to her and met her stare with equal fierceness. “your kid pushed her to the ground! why don’t you talk to him?” jay glared at her. he was about to retort but principal mathews jumped in. “regardless, this kind of action will not be tolerated,” he stated. “i’m giving you both two weeks of detention. this can’t happen again, or i will have no choice but to suspend you. is that clear?” both kids nodded solemnly. “great. then you’re all dismissed.” hailey walked out with spencer, pulled her to a corner in the front lobby and knelt down beside her. “honey, we’ll talk about this later at home.” “i’m sorry, mommy,” spencer mumbled, rubbing her eyes where tears were starting to form. hailey pressed a kiss on her forehead. “what you did wasn’t right. but i never want you to stop standing up for yourself. we’ll just have to figure out different ways for you to do that.” spencer nodded her head. “okay. i love you, mom.” “love you too, baby,” hailey smiled, wiping away her tears. “now get back to class. i’ll pick you up after school.” her daughter sent her a bright smile and skipped off to class. hailey noticed jay was also chatting to milo, but shortly sent him back to class after wrapping him in a hug. he made eye contact with her for a second before he started walking out of the building. but after he had spoken to her in the principle’s office, she just couldn’t let him go without giving him a piece of her mind. “hey you!” she yelled in his direction, following him outside to the parking lot. she noticed his step faltered for a quick second but he didn’t stop. “don’t ignore me! i’m a lawyer, i can sue you!” at that, he finally turned around with a smirk on his face. “i’m a detective,” he explained smugly, “i know the law too, and i’m pretty sure you can’t.” hailey rolled her eyes. “whatever. i just wanted to ask you to tell your kid to stop shoving my daughter to the ground. or else maybe i will sue you.” “are you kidding me?” jay snorted incredulously. “your daughter almost broke his nose!” “because milo pushed her!” “maybe he had a reason to,” he defended, suddenly calm and sporting a smirk, “because if your daughter is anything like you, i understand why he’d want to shut her up.” hailey gasped, in shock and annoyance. “your kid is a little monster and i see where he gets it from!” “monster?” he laughed. “at least he’s not going around attempting to break noses.” hailey rolled her eyes, again. “she’s defending herself and i wouldn’t want it any other way. especially if she’s dealing with the spawn of satan.” jay raised his eyebrows. “are you implying that i’m satan?” “of course you’re satan! you’re being an ass and i don’t care that you’re unbelievably attractive! every time you speak, i want to jump in front of a bus.” for the first time since their heated conversation started, jay didn’t have anything insulting to say. instead, he stopped and really looked at her. her blonde locks were splayed down her shoulders, a little messy from her hands running through them. her blue eyes were on fire, staring at him with such an intensity, he started to laugh. “this is not funny!” hailey protested, fighting the urge to stomp her foot. she was a lawyer; she didn’t like to lose. “why am i even wasting my time here with you? i have better things to do,” she snapped, “just make sure to keep your kid in line.” jay stopped her from walking away by placing a gentle hand on her arm. “would you like to go to dinner with me?” “what?” hailey blinked at him, dumbfounded. jay was breezing through with nothing but confidence. “i know for a fact that you’re a single mother, and i also happen to find you attractive,” he explained. “and from the looks of it, you think i could use some parenting tips.” “i, well —" “you called my kid a monster,” he added with a raised eyebrow in amusement, “please?” hailey swallowed the lump in her throat. “dinner? i can do dinner.” “great!” jay smirked. “i’ll pick you up friday night. is that enough time to find a sitter?” hailey blinked in confusion. “i — what? yes, but, don’t you need my —" “i’m a detective,” his right eyelid dropped in a wink, “i’ll find you.” he walked away and hailey was left wondering how giving him hell ended up with her scoring a date.

✨

hope you guys enjoyed it! i’m not a parent so oops if i went about that the wrong way. also, sorry if it sucked 😬😬 stay safe everyone!!

#upstead #upstead fic #upstead fanfic #upstead fanfiction #upstead au #jay x hailey #jay and hailey #hailey and jay #hailey x jay #halstead x upton #upton x halstead #jay halstead #hailey upton #jesse lee soffer #tracy spiridakos #chicago pd #chicago pd fanfiction #one chicago

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swiss-cheeze · 4 years ago

Text

Bad Day, Good Week || Aaron Hotchner

Requested: YES/NO

Gender: none, no pronouns from my reread.

Description: a bad day turns into a good end of the week

———

Mornings are never your thing, maybe Spencer or Emily but definitely not yours, this morning was normal though. There was a new case, you got briefed by Hotch and were on the plane within the hour to be given duties for touchdown. Normal procedure.

“Reid and Prentiss, I want you guys to go to the previous crime scenes, see what anyone missed. JJ I want you to contact any living people in the victims names; get in touch with Garcia and see what you can find. Morgan and Rossi I want you to go to the morgue, see what's on the body and any lab results. The rest of us will set up at the station.” Hotch had said, it was simple and easy, everyone knew what to do and by the time the plane landed everyone got into their own cars with their partners and headed to their place, you took the road with Hotch at the wheel headed to the station to start some sort of profile and talk theories.

---

“We are looking for a white male, 30 to 40 as well as possibly a woman aged 20 to 30” Hotch started the profile.

“And a woman?” one of the officers asked.

“Possibly,” Reid started as he used his hands to talk, “these murders can be committed by one person but it is also more likely to be an easier clean up with two people, the way these ‘scenes’ have been set out almost allude to a pairing, a very dangerous pairing who share the same fantasy that still hasn't been finished”

“The woman will be petite, small, she's agile but has power,” Derek started, “she handles the killing because it's the easiest job, the man handles the load and then the woman cleans up”

“We know this because he is an ego boosting son of a bitch, he has the sense that the man does the work and the woman stays quiet, this adds to the woman having power however she is also submissive to him as she knows the brute force this man can really give” you stated, “this man he…” you paused, “he may remind you of someone, someone you may know that is confident and outgoing, powerful and uses his status as a place in your life” this made the officers look around confused, including your team.

“(L/n),” Hotch started.

“He may even be known to you, he may even be in this room, he likes to get in on the action, know all the ins and outs of the procedure” you said, the cops in the room looked at each other with a fierce gaze.

BANG

Someone had hit one of the wood tables, this has happened 3 times today previously. That broke the last straw.

“ALRIGHT YOU SON OF A BITCH,” you yelled walking to the man responsible of the table banging from the whole day, “i've just about lost my goddamn temper with you, SOME OF US COME FROM A BACKGROUND WHERE THAT NOISE SETS OFF OUR FIGHT OR FLIGHT AND THIS RIGHT NOW IS MY FIGHT-” just as you grabbed the man's collar Hotch's voice rang out, dark, deep, cold.

“(L/n), outside. Now” Hotch walked out as you let go of the man and pushed him slightly, the man whistled lowly.

“Puppy has an owner,” the man said with a chuckle, before you could turn around and lay a fist on the man both Derek and Spencer stepped in front of you.

“Back off” Spencer spoke harshly.

“And what’re you going to do twig?” the cop asked as he pushed Spencer's shoulder. Before the man could blink Derek had the man's hands behind his back and bent harshly over the nearest surface.

“You are under arrest for putting your hands on a federal agent, if that shoulder push wasn't enough I'll find something” Derek said harshly into the man's ear before bringing him upright forcefully and walking off to a holding cell, along the way Spencer gave you a tight lipped smile. You nodded in thanks before walking off to Hotch and outside the station.

“Hotch-”

“You can lose your job,” Hotch started, “you just threatened a police officer in a state that isn't our own, you had no right-”

“Hotch he’s had it out for me since we got here!” you exclaimed, “banging on tables to see my reaction! Purposely spilled his coffee on my chest! HE JUST CALLED ME A DOG SIR!”

“(L/N) THAT IS ENOUGH,” Hotch bore his eyes into yours with a fury that was so soft you almost thought he was saddened, “you do not yell at your superior like that to get your point across, if you told me these things earlier i would have gotten him taken out of the case and onto a road patrol,” you both knew what was coming next, “you are too invested into this case (L/n)” you sighed softly and looked at the ground, a pregnant pause came over the two of you.

“Kylie Fish,” you said softly, “that's the woman,”

“Why are you so sure?” Hotch responded.

“I figured it out when i went to the previous crime scene yesterday, she left a note she knew only I would find,” Hotch looked at you with a waiting gaze as you bit your lip, “she was my best friend in middle school, she always had this vision of being the best of the best, the best stage actor, the best mathematician; anything she wanted to be the best at. She even said she would kill for it.”

“We’ll look into it” Hotch said, “we’ve given the profile later than we normally would, i want you to go to the hotel and have the rest of the night off, come back in tomorrow fresh faced,” you opened your mouth to ask Hotch something but he seemed to read your mind, “i’ll talk to his supervisor, you don't need to apologise to him or anyone else (L/n)” and then he left, you nodded as you stood outside now alone, that was before someone else walked out. You looked up and saw Derek.

“How are you doing?” Derek asked as the man crossed his arms.

“Hotch wants me to go home for the night, come back fresh faced tomorrow” you said with a sigh.

“Well he's in holding, the officer I mean, Spence gave him a pretty good speaking'' Derek cocked a smile at that, so did you.

“Tell him thanks, I’m gonna go back inside and grab my stuff” you said, you gave Derek a soft smile before walking back into the station, avoiding everyone's gaze, grabbing your stuff from its previous setup and heading towards the door. You made a mental note to thank Spencer back in the hotel rooms later.

---

Walking back into the police station the next day there was a thick and heavy tension in the room from all of the officers. Walking into the conference room you saw everyone already walking around doing their jobs and working on the case, you gave a soft smile to everyone as you walked in holding 7 hot drinks before handing them out to the respective owners. The phone gave a shrill ring as Hotch pressed the answer button and Garcia started talking.

“(L/n) was right my little princess, our woman unsub is Kylie Fish, has a husband and they recently bought a large plot of land and they both match our profile; Kylie doesn't have a job, her husband, Gale, has a high end masculine type job however he isn't in law enforcement”

“Great job Garcia, send the address” Hotch said before hanging up on the girl before looking to you, “(Y/n) i want you to be the one who enters the place first, you know Kylie better than the rest of us maybe you can coax a confession” you nodded before everyone started heading off towards the address given from Garcia.

---

Time passed and you apprehended both Kylie and her husband as the killers with evidence against them, you got a confession from Kylie as well as her showing where the bodies were. Everyone started packing up the room and soon filtered out, leaving you and Hotch alone to finish everything else.

“Thank you for your help today (Y/n),” Hotch said as he placed some files into a box labeled ‘KYLIE FISH’ as well as the date. You smiled.

“That's twice you’ve said my first name today sir” you mentioned with a knowing grin. Hotch seemed to tense up for a moment.

“I apologise” Hotch dismissed.

“Aaron,” you said with a grin as you looked at your superior for his reaction, he stiffened as he looked at you, “it isn't exactly professional but I have seen the way you've looked at me before, you breath in when i walk past you and try to keep me from harm besides when it is needed,” while talking you stepped towards Hotch as he kept eye contact with you.

“You’re one of our best profilers (L/n)” Hotch said, trying to change the subject.

“So is Reid, and Morgan, and Prentiss, and-” you mentioned your teammates knowing it would cause a reaction.

“Okay i get it, where are you going with this?” Hotch sighed as he already knew where this was going, you smiled sweetly as you took Hotch's larger hand in yours and intertwined your fingers together before leaning up and giving Hotch a peck on the lips, his eyes closed momentarily in the sweet bliss. The kiss ended almost before it even started as you stood to your normal height and both you and Hotch looked at each other with a new emotion.

“Dinner?” you asked with a smile.

“When we get back to Quantico I want you to leave your paperwork at your desk for tomorrow and come home with me tonight. I've already got dinner for two set out,” Hotch's eyes seemed to widen for a moment at the mention of his dinner.

“For two? Already set up?” you asked with a knowing grin, “so where are you planning to ask me out today or?”

“Something like that maybe,” Hotch said with a quirk of his lip, “obviously you don't have to if this is too fast or you want to think abou-” before Hotch could finish his sentence of rejection you placed your lips against his again soft but harsh at the same time, promising. Hotch's arms wrapped around your waist as he tilted his head slightly and brought you closer, your arms wrapping around his neck and twirling into his hair. It seemed right, and perfect.

Maybe it was a good morning if this was how the week ended.

#criminal minds #spencer reid #derek morgan #aaron hotchner #penelopie garcia #garcia #emily prentiss #jj #david rossi #alex blake #aaron hotchner x reader #hotch x reader #x reader

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hotchley · 4 years ago

Text

“i think, deep down, we’re all capable of unspeakable things”

morehotchcontent day six: rocky relationship (kinda forgotten anniversary/a big fight)

tagged: @ablogofthecriminalmindsvariety

she knew just what marriage meant to aaron. he’d grown up in south virginia, where tradition was everything. where marriage was everything one could ever hope for. she had grown up in brighton, where people really did not give a flying fuck about any of that. it had never meant much to her, but to aaron it meant everything.

his proposal was so much more than a proposal. it was the final sign that he’d moved on from haley. that he truly loved her. and a part of him would always love haley, there was no point in saying he wouldn’t, but this- this was him saying thank you, i love you, i won’t leave, i trust you, i want to see you in the morning and make you my own all at once.

“i can’t marry you,” she whispered.

keep your tissues handy. that’s all i’m saying.

warnings: implied/referenced child abuse, references to george foyet, mentions of minor character death, cheating

read on ao3!

Everyone viewed Aaron Hotchner as cold and emotionless. Someone who was constantly stoic and unattached, who saw the horrors that came with the BAU and didn’t even flinch. But what most of them didn’t realise was that the man they saw at work and in the field wasn’t Aaron. That man was Hotch. He knew how to compartmentalise, how to pretend that he wasn’t falling apart, how to keep the tremble out of his voice when all he wanted to do was fall apart.

Aaron was a different man. Aaron would play pretend with his son for hours on end, just to keep him happy and make him smile. He woke up in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat and breathing heavily as his body shook and tears streamed down his face as the monsters of his day haunted his night. He would dance with Penelope because he could never say to her.

He was a helpless romantic.

Eleanor- Ellie to her friends, and SSA Birch to local police departments- knew this first-hand.

She had first met Aaron Hotchner during the liaison programme with Kate Joyner. Kate had been unimpressed by everyone there, because the last time she’d done it, they’d all acted like they knew so much better than her. Eleanor had met Aaron first, and immediately wondered where everyone like him had been when Kate first did it.

Because Aaron was lovely. He held doors open, he listened, he smiled at everyone, and he phoned his girlfriend- not his wife, even though they’d been dating since high school and he was now twenty-eight- during every single break they had, regardless of the time difference.

Then she’d fucked up and kissed him. They had both been drunk. A case had gone shit, and she needed something good. But then he called her Haley. And she’d immediately sobered up. He had looked at her with such shame that she almost cried. For some reason, she knew his passcode. The moment he ran to the bathroom to throw up the alcohol, she unlocked it. Phoned Haley. Said that her boyfriend was going to blame himself for what had happened but it wasn’t him it was her.

And Haley… had been lovely. She’d said that she knew Aaron loved her. And that Eleanor seemed like a lovely person but she understood that need for comfort. Eleanor had wondered how people were still so good. She didn’t tell Aaron about the phone call. He left the next day. The programme was finished. She thought that would be the end of it.

Then she transferred over to the BAU. She hadn’t known he was Unit Chief. David Rossi did her interview. It was incredibly awkward at first. She wasn’t used to hiding from her teammates but Aaron had panicked when he first saw her and started pretending he’d never seen her. Her only option was to play along. Haley had just left him at this point.

Kate Joyner obviously recognised her. That was a conversation she never wanted to have again. She thought she’d jeopardised both her place on the team and her dynamic. Then Kate died, Hotch lost his hearing temporarily and she was the only person that Reid would let touch him after the fiasco with Benjamin Cyrus.

She liked Spencer. He was almost like the son she never had.

It was Eleanor that had stayed behind with Aaron after Haley’s funeral and dealt with the phone calls. She told herself it was because she was trying to be a good person and repent for what she had done. Truthfully it was because she knew he was going to fall. And she didn’t want the burden of catching him to fall to the others who had already supported him through so much- Adrian Bale, Vincent Perrotta, Haley leaving.

They’d been getting to a good place. Not quite dating, but not quite friends. She knew he was watching her; there was a reason she was a profiler. He knew she still loved him, but he was grieving Haley. It wouldn’t be fair to her if he suddenly changed their whole dynamic.

But then he faked Emily’s death and it was like they were right back at square one: she would undermine everything he said because she was angry, and he was there, and it was easy to blame him. Her emotions had always been her greatest strength and her fatal flaw.

And then he’d turned up at her apartment, soaked through from the rain, eyes wide and glistening with unshed tears. She’d been too shocked to close the door on him. He’d immediately started rambling about how he couldn’t live the way he was, and how he just needed to know that she trusted him because everything was falling apart and he just needed her.

Not knowing what else to do, she’d kissed him. It had been messy, and wet, and nowhere near as romantic as either of them liked to pretend it had been. But it had been their first actually sober kiss, so it held a special place in her heart. And after that, it was like everything just fell into place.

Which led to the present moment. She knew what day it was. She knew her present to him was still safely tucked away in the bathroom behind her pads and his spare shower gel which he wouldn’t need for another twenty days. She knew he was excited, because for once, he could guarantee that he would be home.

After his surgery, he realised that he couldn’t keep doing what he was doing because sooner or later it was going to kill him. He hadn’t wanted to place the burden of keeping everyone together on Morgan though. So Emily came back. Her and Dave split the paperwork for lead profiler, and Morgan took over as unit chief. It had been difficult for him, those first few months.

But he’d pulled through, and was now living a much more stress free life as a law professor at the local college. It meant he could go to Jack’s school events and be there for him. It let Jessica have more time to herself.

It also meant he planned nice things for days like these. And Ella knew it was unfair to keep him waiting, but she just couldn’t bring herself to get up and go home, choosing instead to focus on the casefile in front of her. The bullpen was quiet: JJ had her own office and had gone home anyways, Reid had gone to see a piano concert thing- she’d tried her best to follow but had just gotten lost- and Anderson was out of town.

So instead of it being lively and loud, it was just her. And her casefile. Which she’d been looking at for the past ten minutes without any of the information going into her head.

With a groan, she slammed it shut and pushed it away.

“Shouldn’t you have gone home by now?” Dave asked, appearing at either the best or worst possible moment depending on your view, just like he always did.

“Probably. But I just- I can’t bring myself to do it,” she confessed.

Dave sighed. “You need to. Aaron will start to worry if you don’t. And we all already told him that there are no cases, so don’t even think of using the paperwork from that as an excuse.”

She sighed. “You’re insufferable.”

“And you still sound like you grew up in Buckingham Palace.” He picked up the case file. “Nothing’s happened here for six months. I’m sure one night won’t hurt. Now go.”

Eleanor packed her stuff up, giving him a small smile as she closed the door behind her. It immediately faded as soon as she’d turned away from him and her stomach started to twist into knots. She didn’t know if the team knew and weren’t saying anything, or if they were actually following the no profiling rule. She wasn’t sure she wanted to know either.

When she unlocked the front door, there was a distinct lack of noise. It made her feel even worse. Hotch had obviously organised for Jack to go and stay with his grandparents because she remembered that Jessica had a date, which would’ve been awkward enough for him, and here she was, two hours late, not because she’d forgotten, but because she hadn’t wanted to go.

“Hi El,” Aaron said as she entered the living room. He was sat on the couch, reading glasses sliding down his nose as he graded papers. “Just let me write this final comment and then I’m yours.”

“Hi,” she replied, feeling uneasy.

Aaron looked up. “You’re supposed to say: I can’t wait that long and then come over and give me a kiss.”

She rolled her eyes but obeyed nonetheless, legs feeling wobbly as she sat on him, smiling when he let out a soft sound of surprise. She tilted his face so she could kiss him and for the moment where their lips met, everything was fine. Then he pulled away, and she just wanted to get away. But his hand was stroking her hip in a comforting gesture and she wasn’t ready to give that up, so instead she ran her hand through his hair.

“What’s this one about?” she asked.

“They’re supposed to be critiquing and suggesting reforms for the law surrounding murder. I gave them a tonne of advice and access to all the relevant articles but some of them still didn’t even try and word it in a way that sounds like their own essay style,” he said, sighing.

Eleanor smiled slightly and set the paper down on the table. “I’m sorry for being late. But I’m here now. So why don’t you show me how all out you went this year?”

Aaron looked into her eyes and she was once again taken aback by how soft and gentle they were. Sometimes it was difficult to remember that he had once beaten a man to death. She tried to remove that thought from her head. It just was not the time.

“You never have to apologise for being late. I used to do your job, remember?”

She nodded. “How could I forget?”

“Do you want to change whilst I reheat dinner?” he asked.

“Sure.”

Their conversations hadn’t sounded that forced since she had first joined the BAU and had been adding sir onto almost all of her statements in an attempt to rile him up.

As she went upstairs to change into something more casual, she also took the time to wipe off her make-up and splash some water on her face. She only intended to take five minutes. But then she started staring at her reflection, trying to see whether or not her actions were as obvious as she thought they were. But then she became aware of the clock ticking- Aaron hated digital clocks because of the flashing numbers- and realised how long she’d been stood there for.

“I was beginning to worry,” Aaron said. A normal comment. But an invitation to tell him what was wrong.

She shrugged. “It’s our anniversary. And although I technically didn’t forget, I was late and I wanted to make that up to you, which meant going through the wardrobe and finding this dress.”

“The fact that you still say wardrobe will never fail to make me laugh,” Aaron said.

He’d made chicken and mushroom pie. Her favourite. She wanted to be sick. It was just a few hours. She could get through a few hours. Aaron was a half-decent person. He listened when people said no. Then she could go to sleep, and everything would go back to normal. Nobody would know but it wouldn’t hang over her head the same way it was when he was sat opposite her, staring with such adoration.

They ate in relative silence. She didn’t want to explain why she was late. She wanted to let him believe that it was purely because time had gotten away from her and that the meeting she’d had with Cruz about the last case had run over. She didn’t want to explain that she’d deliberately walked slowly so she would miss the train. She couldn’t.

“Your present is something old this year. I hope that’s okay,” Aaron said when they had both finished eating. There was a glint in his eye. One he only got when he was about to do something very romantic.

Eleanor frowned. Something old. Where had she heard that?

He got down on one knee.

She gasped.

“My Ella. You continue to love me day after day and for what reason, I don’t know. We didn’t pass on the best terms. But then you came back into my life when I didn’t even realise I needed you, in this massive explosion of passion and love and hope. You were there for me when I didn’t think I’d be able to survive. And you never once doubted me. I know that I’m far from perfect, and there are times where I get angry instead of being understand. And I know that I’ve upset you, but you helped me realise that as a couple, we don’t have to be perfect. We just have to try. I love you. I love you so much that I can’t even begin to put it into words. So I’ll put it into a question. Eleanor Birch, will you marry me?”

She knew just what marriage meant to Aaron. He’d grown up in South Virginia, where tradition was everything. Where marriage was everything one could ever hope for. She had grown up in Brighton, where people really did not give a flying fuck about any of that. It had never meant much to her, but to Aaron it meant everything.

His proposal was so much more than a proposal. It was the final sign that he’d moved on from Haley. That he truly loved her. And a part of him would always love Haley, there was no point in saying he wouldn’t, but this- this was him saying thank you, I love you, I won’t leave, I trust you, I want to see you in the morning and make you my own all at once.

“I can’t marry you,” she whispered.

The box fell from his hands. He moved back into his chair, hands folded neatly in his lap.

“Okay,” he said.

That shocked her back into awareness. “I- what? You just proposed, I said no and all you have to say is okay?”

“I don’t know what you want me to say. I don’t know what I want to say. I want to say that Jack won’t have a problem- in fact, he has and always will be my first priority so I wouldn’t have done this without his permission- but you already know that don’t you?”

She nodded. “I do.”

They both cringed at her choice of words.

“If it’s about changing your surname, I may have grown up with traditional views, but you don’t have to do that. Not if you don’t want to. We can combine them. We could be the Hotchner-Birch’s. Or you could just keep your own. I don’t really mind.”

“It’s not that either.”

“Jack isn’t expecting you to be his mother either. He’ll probably still call you El, just like I do.”

“It isn’t Jack.”

“That was my mother’s engagement ring. She gave it to me when I told her I wanted to propose to Haley. She said that hopefully it would bring me better luck than it had bought her. At the time, I hated the damn thing because it had come from my father. So I didn’t give it to Haley. Now I’m older I understand why she gave it to me. So the girl I married would always be able to have a piece of the woman that made me who I am. But if that weirds you out, we can go look for another one.”

“Would you stop being so good and kind for one fucking minute?” Ella snapped, unable to take anymore.

Aaron flinched, even after all the years that had passed. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

Ella ran a hand through her hair. “God, no. Please don’t be sorry. This isn’t your fault. None of this is your fault. It’s just- I can’t. I can’t marry you and it’s nothing you have done. It’s got nothing to do with Jack either. I love that kid. And I’m so proud of how far he’s come. But I just- I can’t.”

“You’ve told me that. Multiple times now. Just tell me why. Tell me what happened and we can work through it. Because I love you. And I want to spend the rest of my life with you. And if anything happens to me, I want custody of Jack to go to you. Not the state.”

Aaron had never told her that before. They’d spoken at great lengths about children and both agreed that they didn’t want anymore. Jack was enough for both of them. And they’d talked about what would happen if for some reason, Ella had to care for Jack for extended amounts of time. But never like this.

He dropped his gaze when he saw the look on her face. “I’m sorry. You just said you don’t want to marry me, and here I am, dropping bombshells like that on you because that awful part of me wants you to feel guilty. Look, whatever you did, what happened, tell me. We can get through it.”

She hoped that he could abandon his morals long enough for her to not have to say the words. “Aaron, look at me. Please. Please, I need you to look at me.”

Tears were already forming in her eyes when he finally managed to meet her gaze.

“No,” he whispered.

He had seen that look twice in his life. Once when his mother turned to his father and asked why a young lady had phoned asking to speak to her husband. Once when Haley’s mobile had rung and she hadn’t been able to provide the reason behind the call. He knew what that look meant. He knew, and he wished he didn’t because he wasn’t sure he could handle it all over again.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “I am so, so sorry and if I could take it back, I would but I can’t and all I can do is apologise and say that I regret it and I had never felt worse than in that moment.”

“Who was it? Was it someone I know?”

“God no. They would never.”

“Did they look like me?”

“Why are you asking me that?”

“Because I need to know. I need to know who this man was. I need to know why you were so willing to throw our entire relationship away for one night of pleasure. Or was it more? Has this been going on for a while? Am I just a joke to you? Is that what it is?”

“No! And it was a one-time thing, I swear. It only happened once. And if you really must know, yes. He looked like you. Are you happy now? I don’t want to have to relive that night because it was one of the worst nights of my life.”

“Of your life? I was going to marry you Eleanor. When- when even was this? And why?”

Eleanor’s emotions always got the better of her. “You want to know when? It was that case. That case where all the boys turning up dead and mutilated looked exactly like Jack. Like our son. And then the unsub got away. And I phoned you. I phoned you at least five times that night, but not once did you pick up, because you were at a faculty dinner, even though you promised me that you would always be there, no matter where you were. I needed to hear your voice telling me everything would be all right. I needed you, and you weren’t there.”

Aaron gripped the table tightly, all the colour in his face immediately vanishing. He remembered that night. He too regretted it. When he saw Eleanor’s first phone call, he’d started to excuse himself to answer it, knowing there could only be a few reasons for it. But then one of his colleagues had made a snide comment- one he couldn’t even remember now- and he’d put his phone on silent before tucking it away.

When Dave told him about the case because Eleanor couldn’t, he’d felt like the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He still did. How had he fucked up so badly that Eleanor had slept with someone else?

No. That wasn’t on him. He’d screwed up, but she, and she alone, was responsible for her actions. It had been her decision to sleep with someone, not his.

“So you slept with someone else? Why not go to one of the team and tell them instead? Why did you have to sleep with someone?”

“I don’t know! I can’t explain what I did and I can’t justify it but I- you were the one that said we could move past this. You were the one that said, whatever I had done, we could work out together because you loved me. I still love you. I never stopped, not even when you went back to Haley all those years ago. We could make it work.”

Aaron laughed, but there was no humour. “No. No we can’t. Because that case was a month ago. You had a month to tell me, and you’re only telling me now because I asked you to marry me. What was your plan? Just not say anything till either I worked it out myself or you stopped feeling guilty?”

Eleanor didn’t have a response.

Aaron ran his hands through his hair, tugging it. Ella wanted to pry his hands away from it so he didn’t pull it out but that wasn’t her job anymore. It never would be again.

“I feel like such an idiot. You know, when you first kissed me, my first thought was: don’t do this. Because the first time you kissed me, you knew I had a girlfriend. And I was just as responsible because I didn’t pull away immediately, I know. But you kissed me. And in the back of my mind, I knew that there was every chance you would do the same again. I just never thought you actually would because I thought you’d grown up. I guess you haven’t.”

That was the problem with profilers, Eleanor thought to herself. They always knew exactly where to strike in order to cause the most pain. She just never thought Aaron would be the one doing it to her.

“I’m sorry,” she said, because what else could she say?

Aaron shook his head. “I don’t want to hear you say that anymore. You can- I’ll sleep in the guest bedroom until you find an apartment. But once you have, I never want to see you again. I’ll spare Jack the finer details of what happened, but it’ll be his choice whether or not he carries on talking to you. But never refer to him as your son ever again. He isn’t. Not anymore.”

Eleanor did not want his kindness. She wanted Aaron to make her pay. She wanted him to be angry, to hurl insults at her and tell her to get out, that he never wanted to see her again and that she would never be allowed within six feet of his son again.

But Aaron wouldn’t. He was too scared of what would happen if he lost control. He had been since Foyet. And she could mention that. She could mention every fear, every secret, every dream he’d ever shared with her.

She didn’t. She had already hurt him enough.

“I have friends not too far from here. I’ll pack enough for a week and that should be enough time to sort out something more permanent.”

If Aaron heard her, he didn’t say anything.

It only took her ten minutes to pack, which was one of the advantages of living with him. Everything had to be perfectly organised, which meant it was very easy to find things. When she entered the living room, he hadn’t moved. He was still staring at the ground. The ring was on the floor by the dining table, shining despite the darkness of the room.

It was rather ironic, this thing that had led to so much destruction being so beautiful.

“Goodbye Aaron,” Eleanor said, placing her keys on the coffee table.

Only when the door closed behind her for what would probably be the last time did Aaron Hotchner fall to his knees and sob, for the second woman he had loved and lost and for the mother Jack would never get to have.

#morehotchcontent2020 #day six: rocky relationships #aaron hotchner #aaron hotch hotchner #hotch #hotch x ofc #original characters #original female character #david rossi #jack hotchner #tw child abuse #cheating #angst #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #basically i was tired of hotch always being the one cheating #he wouldn’t do that

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